Once, there was this kid who
Went up to his sister's room and brought along a big knife
But when he finally came back
His sis was just a corpse lying lifeless
And so they locked him up till the night that he came home

(Heavy breathing)
Huh Huh Huh Huh
Huh Huh Huh Huh

(**Dr Loomis**
"He came home...")

Once, there was this boy who
Went to camp at Crystal Lake, but didn't have no friends
But when he drowned in the lake
His mom went there and killed all the counselors
The counselors chopped her head off
But Jason got his revenge

Ch... Ch... Ch... Ch...
Ch... Ch... Ch... Ch...

(**Crazy Ralph**
"You're all doomed!")

Ch... Ch... Ch... Ch...
Ch... Ch... Ch... Ch...

(**Mrs. Voorhees**
"You never paid any attention to him!")

Both Michael and Jason are equals
They've both starred in endless sequels

And then, there was this guy who
Used to be a janitor until he started killing
But when they finally killed him
He said that he'd come back in kids' nightmares
And so he started killing some people down on Elm Street

Ha Ha Ha Ha
Ha Ha Ha Ha

Ch Ch Ch Ch
Ch Ch Ch Ch

(**Freddy**
"Welcome to my world...")

(People dressed as Michael Myers, Jason, and Freddy bow to the audience of other slashers -- Chucky, Hannibal Lecter, Candyman, Leprechaun, Norman Bates, Dracula, Damien, Regan McNeil, and Carrie. They all exit the theater after the show.)