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Song Parodies -> "I Wanna Be Hitched"

Original Song Title:

"I Wanna Be Rich"

Original Performer:

Calloway

Parody Song Title:

"I Wanna Be Hitched"

Parody Written by:

Immoral Liberal

The Lyrics

"Snatch, fold, that's what I need..."

Oh, oh, oh...
Oh, oh, oh...

SS inspectors, they tap my phone; (ring-a-ling-a-*click*)
Surveillance posted around my home;
Someday, they're coming to take me down,
But when they do, I'll be out of town!

You see,

I like honey, lots and lots of honey--
I got her pie in my eye...
I want honey, lots and lots of honey--
Here's why they sneak and they spy:

I wanna be hitched... oh!
I wanna be hitched... oh, oh!
I wanna be hitched... oh!
I wanna be hitched...

...To a girl no older than six.

Oh!

I want to bake her a cake or two,
Feed her my scones with a silver spoon.
I'm taking her out for a spot of tea;
She brings her favorite doll, Betsy.

You see,

I like honey, kisses sweet as honey:
Friend, I will tell you no lie. Oh!
She's my honey, cuter than a bunny;
Love her so much, I could die!

I wanna be hitched... oh!
I wanna be hitched... oh, oh!
I wanna be hitched... (la la, la la la la) oh!
I wanna be hitched...

...To a girl who has just turned six.

Got me enslaved;
Hitched...
...Girl who has just turned six

I'll do all the things you want me to:
I'll warm your bed and cuddle you... (Cuddle you...)
Keep you from monsters at night--
And the flashing light
That gives you such a fright--
When hitched!

"Yeah that's what I wanna do."
"Say whoops! I say uh oh!"
"Woo! Woo! Woo!"

Oh, oh, oh...
Oh, oh, oh...

Got to be, baby!
We just gotta be hitched!
We just gotta be... (just gotta be...)

Cause baby,

I love honey: your tea, and your honey,
I got your pie in my eye... (Oh...!)
I want honey! Give me sugar, Honey! (Oh...!)
Gets me so high, I could fly!

I wanna be hitched... (la la, la la la la)
I wanna be hitched... (la la, la la la la)
(You know what I mean, antis!)
I wanna be hitched... (la la, la la la la)
(Every day, rest of my life!)
I wanna be hitched... (la la, la la la la)

...To my girl, who just got past six.

Be hitched...
"Sure, Honey... there's plenty to go around."
Be hitched...
Be hitched...
(Oh...!)

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 LittleLots
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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 5   2
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

littleVotress - March 11, 2008 - Report this comment
If you change the age to 26, Sir, this reads a lot better! If you increase the age to say, 46, it gets really funny!
Red Ant - March 12, 2008 - Report this comment
" wanna be hitched... To a girl no older than six." was the best line. Perhaps a follow up to Jethro Tull's "Thick As A Brick" is in order.

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