There's a cop sitting out on the freeway
Breathilizer in hand
Arrests at least two people every night
Going down the road thinking they can drive
But they're a dizzy man

Your friend's reaching out for your car keys
Saying not to take a chance
He hasn't even had a sip of beer all night
Let him take you home and it'll be all right
You're a dizzy man

Shouldn't drive
Shouldn't run
Give the car keys to someone
Everyone can see you've gone too far

You've lost responsibilities
Cause of your high BAC
And when you say "Take me drunk I'm home"
You don't know how right you are
Dizzy man

There's a jury in deliberation
They'd rather watch the Bucs and Rams
But it's very important that they get it right
You need to go to jail because you tried to drive
You were a dizzy man

Yesterday I saw a headstone that was cool
If only I had had some O'Douls

There's a special 60 days later at the night club
25 cents a can
You say no way, can't drink tonight
I'm the designated driver for another guy
And he's a dizzy man

Gotta drive
Gotta run
Take the car keys from someone
Everyone can see he's gone too far

You've got responsibilities
Cause of your low BAC
And when they say "Take me drunk I'm home"
Now you know how right they are
Dizzy man
Dizzy man