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Song Parodies -> "Cap'n Crunch"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

Beastie Boys

Parody Song Title:

"Cap'n Crunch"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Crunchatize Me Captain!!!
Your bad habit’s for the Trix Rabbit
Want no T-bone steak just Frosted Flakes
Those you might be munching but can’t compare
To what’s in my bowl these brown sugar squares
Man, I can eat packs with milk or dry
From the day I’m born till I die
Breakfast, dinner or for lunch
Can’t get too full of Cap’n Crunch!!!

Yum! Yum! Yum!!!
Some other punk likes that Fruit Loops garbage
Well, Follow your nose straight into my carnage!
Running out I won’t sob!
It’s time for me to go and grocery shop!

Flashed Fruity Pebbles that’s a threat
Won't make me sweat like that white haired pirate
Quaker Oats is my choice won’t try Kellogg’s
Squeeze milk out of that cow for Cap’n Crunch!!!

This snack every morning isn’t small
“Crunchatize Me!!!” shout for the Cap’n Crunch
“Crunchatize Me!!!” shout for the Cap’n Crunch
“Crunchatize Me!!!” shout for the Cap’n Crunch
“Crunchatize Me!!!” shout for the Cap’n Crunch

You like Pop-Tarts? They’re not in my cart
Must I reiterate just what I ate
It’s so addicting I must stuff my face
And with some milk it’s chased until my stock’s erased
So I’m overweight and I'm glued to the table
My fingers twitch when I tear off the label
Donuts you eat when time for brunch
But when it’s up to me it’s Cap’n Crunch!!!

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   7

User Comments

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Christie Marie M - June 30, 2009 - Report this comment
Crunchatize you with 3 sets of 5's, Matt!!
Mark Scotti - June 30, 2009 - Report this comment
Yummy...with sabotageberries!!!!
Medemia - July 02, 2009 - Report this comment
Loved it until you dissed Fruity Pebbles. :) Enjoyed it more than the OS. Gotta keep the Soggies away. 5, 5, 5
Rex - July 03, 2009 - Report this comment
(Artistry) The juxtaposition of that music with these lyrics is hilarious - I can just picture Captain Crunch rapping.
MsMunchALot - July 03, 2009 - Report this comment
Squire Matthias, I love the Cold Cereals, too, Sir ! My secret desire is ~RICE CHEX~ My Dad poured them into his 'Party Mix", which was a fad food in the 60's! despite the Cowboys demanding HotCereal, like polenta & Oatmeal.
Agrimorfee - July 08, 2009 - Report this comment
I bow respectfully to my Sabotage competitor...crunchtastic.
bobpiecheese - July 13, 2009 - Report this comment
(Artistry) We don't get Cap'n Crunch here in Australia - I'm assuming it's amazingly delicious? Great job here Matthias (as usual), 555!
Below Average Dave - July 15, 2009 - Report this comment
The idea was great Matty, but like TCOP, you missed Beastie Boys tough internal rhyming in a few spots, and unfortunately on this one it made it jive kinda odd, I still liked it, and with considerable editing I think it'd be hilarious to record because someone screaming about Captain Crunch is somehow satisfying just to think about, but as is, I thin you may have been runnin gout of time when you had to complete this one.

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