verse 1:
last ride
I still fit into it
although my mother said
that I am far too old
it felt so special and
yet so uncomfortable
as we all rolled
two feet up above

I crammed my hiner
ooh, I whined
I bruised my hips
I felt my legs slip
out of the doors...
I softly cried cos what they said was true, it was

chorus:
last ride
the buggy carts for two
last ride
I paid 4.22
I had big fun, vroom-vroom
the cardboard palmtrees shivered
I'm so happy but I'm very awkward too

verse 2:
last ride
the wooden floor collapsed
the blamed it on my weight
but I was innocent
wit' all the memories
I sank in fantasies
as I just stroked the metal of mauve, oh-oh-oh...

deep in the night
right by the ferris' fright
I saw no kid in sight
was alone!
I snuck into control
I turned the speed up more
I almost died; I jumped a car with broken doors

alternate chorus:
last ride
the crowd is chanting "boo"
last ride
my horn it doesn't toot
I spread my arms out too
and knock out several children
I'm so heavy now and very awkward too

verse 3:
tunnels
up ahead
the first, I duck, so laughable
the second one fractures my skull
hold tight!
speed out of control
derailed, can't stop
steer breaks off
as my buggy hurtles oooooo....

(last ride
the buggy ride for two
last ride
I paid 4.22)
...oooon- UNGH!
I hit the roundabout
the stand of cotton candy
my old buggy's now a bumper kart of doom

(repeat chorus with ad libs into fade)