(verse 1)
Long time ago, back in '78
There was a TV show, and we thought it was great...
About a man named Steve, who flew a ship in the sky,
But when the ship crashed down, you know, he almost died...
So they made him bionic.

(chorus)
And then Oscar said, "We have the technology
To build a man with electric anatomy.
He'll do anything, but it won't be free;
We'll do it for six million dollars."

(verse 2)
Jamie Summers went up for a dive--
Her 'chute didn't open, but still she survived.
Now she's tearing phonebooks in half with her hands,
And she can hear through walls--now how'd she do that?
Say, isn't she bionic?

(chorus)
And then Oscar said, "We have the technology
To build a woman with electric anatomy.
She'll do anything, but it won't be free;
We'll do it for six million dollars."

(bridge)
Every show is the same,
Steve and Jamie fightin' crime,
cause it just don't pay
They're leaping buildings and chasing trains.
Oh, Evel Kinevil came
To help Jamie put an end to all the pain
And Steve and Sasquatch did the same.

(verse 3)
The plot got stale, and the ratings dropped,
So the producers got creative and they brought in a dog.
He had electronic legs, and jaws like a vice,
And when Steve and Jamie got married, you know, he was throwin' the rice,
'Cause I think he was bionic... (and I think...)

That's a little too bionic... (Yeah, I really do think!)

(chorus)
And then Oscar said, "We have the technology
To build a family with electric anatomy.
Should have drawn the line with Steve and Jamie;
But they did it for six million dollars."