To all the Dads who shop at Sears
In worn out shirts and weekend beards
Who wander the tool aisle, with their Tool Time smiles
To all the Dads who shop at Sears

To all the tools that Sears does have
It makes them glad that they are a Dad
Their in a special land
The world of The Craftsman
To all the Dads who shop at Sears

You will find them on a Saturday
Buying tools they never will use
Getting them cause their new and shiny
That's just a manly thing they do

It doesn't matter what it is
A huge table saw or a small drill bit
As long as it's a tool
And it might make Dad look cool
To all the Dads who shop at Sears

To all the projects left undone
Cause working in the weekend sun
Once was a good idea
Has now lost all appeal
To all the Dads who shop at Sears

Who cares if the tools are never used
All Dads buy them just in case
What matters is their spanking new
It brings a smile upon their face

Now there are other places they can go
True Value, Lowe's and The Home Depot
But Sears replacement guarantee
For all hand tools, brings ecstasy
To all the Dads who shop at Sears

And so this coming Father's Day
Take him to Sears and make his day
Buy him all the tools he thinks of
And he'll feel like The King, Bob Vila
To all the Dads who shop at Sears