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Song Parodies -> "Ted's Tumors (The Dead Kennedy Song)"
Original Song Title:
"Look At All These Rumors"
Original Performer:
Timex Social Club
Parody Song Title:
"Ted's Tumors (The Dead Kennedy Song)"
Parody Written by:
Poli-tick-ly Incorrect
The Lyrics
Here's a parody for all those left-wing hardcore liberals who love the Kennedy's so much. Enjoy!
How do these tumors get started, do they happen to overzealous liberals and
They get mad hearin' somethin', they can't stand it if someone is scoldin'
All the tumor augmentation and the internal cyst
But this twisted neoplasm, ooh, it remain to exist
Maybe dems think he's cute, but I'm not at all impressed
For one time only the Senate has gone into recess
Nuking all Ted's tumors with chemo everyday
Oh when's he gonna, gonna pass away- from
All these tumors, he can't take it no more
Robert Byrd said: "Ted is dead" Now there's a funeral on the Senate floor
Political arena, Ted's been sort of obtuse
That drunkard sot has got some alcohol abuse
Dimwit from Massachusetts, some say he's got no brain
His ideas are askew, but the liberals love him anyway
Heard he had a brain scan, found a cystic brain disease
Oh, when's he gonna apologize to the Kopechne's
Nuking all Ted's tumors with chemo everyday
Oh when's he gonna, gonna pass away - from
All these tumors, he can't take it no more
Robert Byrd said: "Ted is dead" Now there's a funeral on the Senate floor
Can't stand his face, gonna flip a finger
He's such a disgrace, cuz when it comes to his tumors he's a half-dead left-winger
It seems from those tumors he's gonna pass away
I bet there will be Chuck Schumer sobbing all day
I think this death-bed Senator will pass another med bill
For the next time they find Kennedy's tumors buried at Capitol Hill
Nuking all Ted's tumors with chemo everyday
Oh when's he gonna, gonna pass away- from
All the tumors, he can't take it no more
Robert Byrd said: "Ted is dead" Now there's a funeral on the Senate floor
(Ted sings)
"Brain entwined, entwined, I don't got time for tumors in my life
I'm a man who drinks, not a man who thinks, so please let me live my life
Brain entwined, entwined, I don't got time for tumors in my life
I'm a man who drinks, not a man that thinks, so please let me live my life
Brain entwined, entwined, I don't got time for tumors in my life
I'm a man who drinks, not a man who thinks, so please let me live my life"
Treating all Ted's tumors with chemo everyday
Oh when's he gonna, gonna pass away from
All these tumors, he can't take it no more
Robert Byrd said: "Ted is dead" Now there's a funeral on the Senate floor
Nuking all Ted's tumors with chemo everyday
Oh when's he gonna, gonna pass away from
All these tumors, he can't take it no more
Robert Byrd said: "Ted is dead" Now there's a funeral on the Senate floor
Start countin' Ted's tumors
The Senators say their goodbyes
Start cryin', Chuck Schumer
You freaky little guy
Start conutin' Ted's tumors
The Senators say their goodbyes
Start cryin', Chuck Schumer
You freaky little guy
Nukin' all Teds tumors
Chemo go-byebye
They get mad hearin' somethin', they can't stand it if someone is scoldin'
All the tumor augmentation and the internal cyst
But this twisted neoplasm, ooh, it remain to exist
Maybe dems think he's cute, but I'm not at all impressed
For one time only the Senate has gone into recess
Nuking all Ted's tumors with chemo everyday
Oh when's he gonna, gonna pass away- from
All these tumors, he can't take it no more
Robert Byrd said: "Ted is dead" Now there's a funeral on the Senate floor
Political arena, Ted's been sort of obtuse
That drunkard sot has got some alcohol abuse
Dimwit from Massachusetts, some say he's got no brain
His ideas are askew, but the liberals love him anyway
Heard he had a brain scan, found a cystic brain disease
Oh, when's he gonna apologize to the Kopechne's
Nuking all Ted's tumors with chemo everyday
Oh when's he gonna, gonna pass away - from
All these tumors, he can't take it no more
Robert Byrd said: "Ted is dead" Now there's a funeral on the Senate floor
Can't stand his face, gonna flip a finger
He's such a disgrace, cuz when it comes to his tumors he's a half-dead left-winger
It seems from those tumors he's gonna pass away
I bet there will be Chuck Schumer sobbing all day
I think this death-bed Senator will pass another med bill
For the next time they find Kennedy's tumors buried at Capitol Hill
Nuking all Ted's tumors with chemo everyday
Oh when's he gonna, gonna pass away- from
All the tumors, he can't take it no more
Robert Byrd said: "Ted is dead" Now there's a funeral on the Senate floor
(Ted sings)
"Brain entwined, entwined, I don't got time for tumors in my life
I'm a man who drinks, not a man who thinks, so please let me live my life
Brain entwined, entwined, I don't got time for tumors in my life
I'm a man who drinks, not a man that thinks, so please let me live my life
Brain entwined, entwined, I don't got time for tumors in my life
I'm a man who drinks, not a man who thinks, so please let me live my life"
Treating all Ted's tumors with chemo everyday
Oh when's he gonna, gonna pass away from
All these tumors, he can't take it no more
Robert Byrd said: "Ted is dead" Now there's a funeral on the Senate floor
Nuking all Ted's tumors with chemo everyday
Oh when's he gonna, gonna pass away from
All these tumors, he can't take it no more
Robert Byrd said: "Ted is dead" Now there's a funeral on the Senate floor
Start countin' Ted's tumors
The Senators say their goodbyes
Start cryin', Chuck Schumer
You freaky little guy
Start conutin' Ted's tumors
The Senators say their goodbyes
Start cryin', Chuck Schumer
You freaky little guy
Nukin' all Teds tumors
Chemo go-byebye
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Voting Breakdown
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| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 10 | 10 | 10 |
User Comments
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Sick and offensive.
These are the same people who flip out when we point out the deficiencies in Republican brains, from Reagan (Alzheimer's) to Palin (just plan dumb).
OMG... This parody is eerily reminiscent of the banned and presumably unlamented Linda Terhune's work!
Could be Linda Terhune under a different name, you never know...
What a brilliant take on a low IQ cowardly thug living off a bootlegger's fortune! Superb!
Dumb? Typical illiterate liberal? You are the pot calling the kettle brown, Mr. I'm-Asking-To-Be-Banned. You are worse than a mash up of Linda T and K.Y.L.E.
Whatever. Joe Momma was right.
You did a great job with this one! Keep up the good work! I guess we don't have to worry about any more Kennedy's, thank God!
When's he gonna pass away? He did while I was on vacation in New Hampshire. That was in August.
Amanda, for your information, I wrote this parody in November 2008 - ten months before Ted croaked. I guess the curse on him did the trick then, didn't it?
The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.
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