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Song Parodies -> "Every Toy You Break"
Original Song Title:
"Every Breath You Take"
(MP3)Original Performer:
The Police
Parody Song Title:
"Every Toy You Break"
Parody Written by:
Spaff.com
The Lyrics
Every toy you break
Every mess you make
Every bug you bake
Every cold you fake
Santa's watchin' you
Every cat you kick
Every nose you pick
Every floor you lick
If you bathe too quick
Santa's watchin' you
Oh, kid get wise
Can't shake Santa's spies
His surveillance guys
They beat the FBI's!
Every loog you spit
Every friend you hit
Every class you ditch
Every fit you pitch
Santa's watchin' you
Santa's coming, there's just so much he'll take
So you had better be good for goodness' sake
If you get stiffed on the toys that's your mistake
He sees you sleeping and knows when you're awake
So I beg you, wear pa-jamas - please!
Every bed you wet
Every burp you let
If your mom's upset
Here's your Christmas threat:
Santa's watchin' you
Got his elves deployed
I'd be paranoid
Santa's watchin' you
Santa's watchin' you...
Every mess you make
Every bug you bake
Every cold you fake
Santa's watchin' you
Every cat you kick
Every nose you pick
Every floor you lick
If you bathe too quick
Santa's watchin' you
Oh, kid get wise
Can't shake Santa's spies
His surveillance guys
They beat the FBI's!
Every loog you spit
Every friend you hit
Every class you ditch
Every fit you pitch
Santa's watchin' you
Santa's coming, there's just so much he'll take
So you had better be good for goodness' sake
If you get stiffed on the toys that's your mistake
He sees you sleeping and knows when you're awake
So I beg you, wear pa-jamas - please!
Every bed you wet
Every burp you let
If your mom's upset
Here's your Christmas threat:
Santa's watchin' you
Got his elves deployed
I'd be paranoid
Santa's watchin' you
Santa's watchin' you...
Copyright 2003+ Spaff.com. Shameless plug: Get this on the Robert Lund CD Elves Gone Wild!
Your Vote & Comment Counts
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 10 | 9 | 10 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
He's a man who leads a life so jolly
Shows up with the mistletoe and holly
With every toy you break
Another note he makes
Odds are there'll be coal inside your stocking
Secret Santa Man!
Secret Santa Man!
He's workin' at the North Pole
And every kid knows his name
Shows up with the mistletoe and holly
With every toy you break
Another note he makes
Odds are there'll be coal inside your stocking
Secret Santa Man!
Secret Santa Man!
He's workin' at the North Pole
And every kid knows his name
Spaff - You got this one working nicely. Good job.
HAHAHA! Better than the FBI's...hee hee :-D
Naughty!
I love this one! Destined to become a treasured holiday classic!
"Every bug you bake" - Spaff you were a naughty boy! ;-D
Great work Spaff!
Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho! That's five!
I heard a rumor that ELVES GONE WILD was only 9.99!! Is that possible?! WHAT A DEAL!!
Excellent work Spaff...kinda reminds me of my "I always think that Santa is watching me" (http://www.amiright.com/parody/80s/rockwellandmichaeljackson0.shtml ) ....oh, and save a copy of Elves gone wild for me, Im gonna buy it...soon..I promise lol
Nice!
Thanx, Guy & Rice & Peter & Pip & Michaelopedia & Diva & Johnny Johnny bo bonny banana fana fo fonny fee fi mo monny Johnny!
Mel & Mer: The "every bug you bake" was ripped off from (er, I mean "inspired by") Melhi's "Goin' Out of My Gourd" (http://www.amiright.com/parody/70s/creedenceclearwaterrevival25.shtml), which introduced the lovely word "magnifry" and brought back fond memories of doing just that.
Billy: This was going to be a parody of "Somebody's Watching Me," but you beat me to it, which I still haven't forgiven you for. So it's your fault that I had to do this one instead. Nevertheless, I've got a copy of the CD for you at www.elvesgonewild.com
Claude: But wait - there's more! If you ACT NOW, shipping is only $2 per order (not per CD), so everyone needs to follow your example, buy lots of copies, and SAVE SAVE SAVE.
Mel & Mer: The "every bug you bake" was ripped off from (er, I mean "inspired by") Melhi's "Goin' Out of My Gourd" (http://www.amiright.com/parody/70s/creedenceclearwaterrevival25.shtml), which introduced the lovely word "magnifry" and brought back fond memories of doing just that.
Billy: This was going to be a parody of "Somebody's Watching Me," but you beat me to it, which I still haven't forgiven you for. So it's your fault that I had to do this one instead. Nevertheless, I've got a copy of the CD for you at www.elvesgonewild.com
Claude: But wait - there's more! If you ACT NOW, shipping is only $2 per order (not per CD), so everyone needs to follow your example, buy lots of copies, and SAVE SAVE SAVE.
So, I'm getting a cut of the royalties?! (Just kidding.) Thanks Spaff, it makes my day to learn that I helped to inspire a small part of something this good.
Mel: No - thank YOU. Trust me, if I get rich off this CD, I'll throw a lavish party and make you the guest of honor. Right now I'm just hoping to break even.
I bought it late last night!
Great pacing, great rhyming, great parody. Fives, mate.
Spaff, you got it goin' ON with this song. Great use of a non-Christmas song for a Christmas theme. How many songs are there on this site that do that? Somebody point me to 'em, please. d;:^)
Thanx, Dingo (ABD) & Bee Gee. And William: I hope you get your $9.99's worth.
A good song from a great CD. And not even the best song on the CD!
Thanx, Jeffaroo. And I agree - it's hard to compete with the NINETEEN OTHER TRACKS. (What a bargain!)
Spaff, you're a genius!. So busy over Christmas - must atone. This is really great stuff. Please, how to buy CD?
David, You can order online. www.elvesgonewild.com. Delivery takes about 4 or 5 days. At least mine got here that quickly.
I *knew* I made the right move in hiring Guy to do my PR.
David: Thanks, and Guy's correct - you can repent online at ElvesGoneWild.com. $9.99 and a couple Hail Marys oughtta do the trick.
David: Thanks, and Guy's correct - you can repent online at ElvesGoneWild.com. $9.99 and a couple Hail Marys oughtta do the trick.
One of my favs on Elves Gone Wild! I love this! 5's!
Jackie: I finally caught and replied to your note on the message board too. So thanks x2.
Say it loud, Im voting again and Im proud!
Just in case Santa is watching I´m restoring some 5s.
Kinda like Ray Stevens' "Santa Claus Is Watching You!"
Billy DBA Florio & Peter chyd: Thanks again!
ILikeRipoffs: You'll really enjoy my next parody, which is about a serial streaker hitting a supermarket and a basketball game.
ILikeRipoffs: You'll really enjoy my next parody, which is about a serial streaker hitting a supermarket and a basketball game.
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