Song Parodies -> "Dick Needs Vasectomy"

Original Song Title:

"Don't Stand So Close To Me"

^(MP3)

Original Performer:

"Dick Needs Vasectomy"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

I could have written this song for the old and bad title pun alone. I could have held on to that until the last verse or chorus and not given it away in the very first lines of the whole song. I could have done that but instead I wrote it for the neighbourhood friendly chorus - sing it out, sing it loud, sing it proud, sing along with it in public places - then enjoy the straightjacket…

A YouTube version of the original song can currently be found here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kvfb8GcKAWs

My neighbour, name Richard, has a large family tree
He's fertile, like crazy, bred children thirty-three
Off marriage, he's bonking, lots' women, in a craze
Booty king, he gets it on, the side from every race

Dick needs…
Dick needs a…
Dick needs vasectomy
Dick needs…
Dick needs a…
Dick needs vasectomy

His friends are so jealous, you know how old men get
Sometimes he makes them queasy, when he's in Stud Gazette
Lactation, gestation, he just needs cast an eye
When eggs drop, he's mating, he'll burst a ten pound fly

Dick needs…
Dick needs a…
Dick needs vasectomy
Dick needs…
Dick needs a…
Dick needs vasectomy

Once shot by a bridegroom, but this dick will not die
He's screwed half the courtroom, waves child support bye-bye
It's like this, girls see him, they start to procreate
Ten thousand, they stalk him, the whole town ovulates

Dick needs…
Dick needs a…
Dick needs vasectomy
Dick needs…
Dick needs a…
Dick needs vasectomy

Repeat Chorus
or
CUT!

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TJC - March 26, 2010 - Report this comment

Tickled? Nay--you actually fractured my funny bone... servin' you with fives!

John Barry - March 26, 2010 - Report this comment

Laughed my vas off.

Phil Nelson - March 26, 2010 - Report this comment

Funny!

Matthias - April 09, 2010 - Report this comment

Nice innuendo and a good parody!

Andria - April 10, 2010 - Report this comment

(SOTM March 2010) Hilarious, sexually explicit but not so much that it's best suited to Whatfreaks, and well-done all around. 5s.

Jeff Reuben - April 15, 2010 - Report this comment

SOTM: My first thought was that Synchronicity doesn't match the syllables. My next was, "Oh...Don't Stand So Close to Me does!" Hilarious, you did well with this one!

Below Average Dave - April 19, 2010 - Report this comment

I have to be a hundred percent honest in saying the odd grammatical use of the English language on this one was way too much for me to really get into this. I like the general idea, but what you had to do to make it work was very difficult to get a good laugh out of. . .sorry buddy

Abbott Skelding - April 24, 2010 - Report this comment

SOTM- Excellent job! 555 more babies on the way!

Arwen - April 29, 2010 - Report this comment

SOTM...this just tickled me, K1...loved it! Stud Gazette...The whole town ovulates...lots and lots of laughs!

bobpiecheese - April 29, 2010 - Report this comment

(SOTM) Well, that was definitely weird. Funny, and well written and paced and stuff, but yeah, weird. Maybe that's just me, though. 555

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