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Song Parodies -> "Handyman"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

The Highwaymen

Parody Song Title:


Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

I was a handyman, a long bed pickup was my pride
Quarts of liquor I'd imbibe
Sweaty old butt crack did I model as I slaved
Plenty of mold-germ fell from pine studs that I shaved
Some plaster sprung free, I was pinned, did not survive
But I was still revived

I was a jailer, I abhorred the cons inside
With a key I did preside
I flailed a loser found with porn too wet to stow
I sent a rotten churl to days alone below
And when them 'tards broke out, they met me on a hill
Behind a whiskey still

I was a can filler, I tossed the shriveled meat that slides
Where wheels and choppers did reside
I glazed pork shoulder on the line, all a-blotto
I slipped on gelatin, was left to bleed alone
They carried me to some clay room below the ground
But I am still in town

I'll always need a round and a round
And a round and a round and a round and a round...

My life's a hard trip, bosses rude, and worse, unkind
I'd like to flee this utter grind
To find a place where festive spirits lift my brain
Perhaps I'll taste some rum when Friday comes again
Or I may simply need to sing to stop the pain
Just a shrill refrain

As I get smashed again and again
And again and again and again and again...

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 2.8
How Funny: 2.8
Overall Rating: 2.8

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   4
 2   2
 3   0
 4   0
 5   4

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Timmy - January 15, 2015 - Report this comment
This really follows the OS - rhyme and meter and what you do with the storyline. Hope you get by 5, which is what I give you.
Patrick - January 15, 2015 - Report this comment
Good to see you back, again and again, and again. The verse about the can filler reminds me of a description of a Chicago packing plant in Upton Sinclair's "The Jungle". A fellow working to close to a vat slipped and fell and became Oldham's Leaf Lard. Not the most prolific writer at AIR, just one of the best.
Leough - January 15, 2015 - Report this comment
Thanks guys!
Patrick, the can filler verse was actually referencing something else.
Meriadoc - January 17, 2015 - Report this comment
...goes back to read the can-filler verse again....
Andy Primus - January 18, 2015 - Report this comment
LOL @ "Sweaty old butt crack" line

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