Song Parodies -> "Solei In The Sky With Hymens"

Original Song Title:

"Lucy In the Sky With Diamonds"

Original Performer:

"Solei In The Sky With Hymens"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

Solei is, is of course, Qasim Soleimani, the Head of the Iranian Revolutionary Guard Corps who recently got his ticket punched to the heavenly bacchanalia that is promised to all Muslims who are KIA when furthering the expansion of Islam thru jihad. Except in this case, Qasim is going to be greeted by 82 virgins. All the images of Islamic heaven are found in the Quran

Picture yourself on a road near an airport
Revered warrior poet for killer Shi'ites
Somebody cries out, reacting too slowly
Shahid with the horror struck eyes
Hell-firing missile of metal and flame
Powering down to your head
Look to the sky with the fear in your eyes
And you're gone (Boom! Boom! Boom!)

Solei in the sky with hymens!
Solei in the sky with hymens!
Solei in the sky with hymens!
(A-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-h .. Auugh!)

Floating on up to a spring of cool water
Where jewel-bedecked women on soft pillows lie
Ghilmani smile as you waft past Al Tooba*
That grows so incredibly high
Bloodthirsty henchmen appear by your side
Waiting to whisk you away
Follow their lead to the harem of God
And you're in (boom .. boom .. boom)

Solei in the sky with hymens
Solei in the sky with hymens
Solei in the sky with hymens
(A-a-a-a-a-a-ugh .. A-augh)

Picture yourself at a celestial orgy
With endless young booty for jihadin' guys
Suddenly one more is there for the taking
A girl with the lustrous dark eyes
(Unghh, unghh, unghh)

Solei in the sky with hymens
Solei in the sky with hymens
Solei in the sky with hymens
(Unnnnnnngh .. unnngh)

Solei and his guys in hymens
Solei and his guys in hymens
Solei in the sky with hymens
(Wa-a-a-a-a-ah .. laah!)

(Repeat 70 more times .. or is it 80 more times for the Solei brother)

*Al Toobah is a shade tree with a crown so wide it would take a man 100 years to walk from one side to the other … I may be going out on a limb here ..(ba doom tssh) .. but I'm guessing it's incredibly tall too … Ghilmani are beautiful young boys who wait on women hand and foot and serve them delicious treats. The Quran vaguely hints that they also satisfy other appetites as well -- both male and female

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Sgt. Pepper - January 10, 2020 - Report this comment

Not very funny. The Quran, like all religious scripts have allegorical elements that detractors love to lampoon and/or distort. Solei may have been a jerk but his death wasn't necessary and it's just a 'wag the dog' gimmick by Benedict Dotard, an incestuous wimpy immature crybaby Caligula criminal spankee boy.

CML - January 11, 2020 - Report this comment

I used the imagery of Islamic heaven because it works perfectly with the surreal imagery of the OS. And Islamic clerics debate the issue of whether Ghilmani are to used as sexual objects all the time .... And, BTW, what does Trump need a distraction from -- record employment numbers; Dow at 29K; Nancy Pelosi's clown car impeachment show?

CML - January 11, 2020 - Report this comment

RIddle me this, Sarge. Islam tells young men that if they die in jihad, this act instantly discharges all previous non Islamic bad behaviour, no matter how egregious and that they instantly go to heaven; not only that it tells young men who most likely have never been allowed to touch a woman before that they will have endless sex with females of incredible beauty. So how is it a "distortion" to say that Islam creates incentives for Muslims to go and kill non Muslims

Libby - January 13, 2020 - Report this comment

"...record employment numbers; Dow at 29K...". Some of which he had no actual responsibility for, that's about it. And this has improved your life or your loved ones'?

Sgt. Pepper - January 14, 2020 - Report this comment

Riddle me this, CML. What were the 'incentives' and reasons for the Crusades. they were 'Christian jihads'. All 'religious wars' AREN'T. Those ISIS types ain't Muslims, they're MURDERERS and MFs. Just like the followers of the self-appointed 'chosen one' (trump) are not Christians either. Both religions and others are based on the 10 Commandments. Following them is another matter.

CML - January 15, 2020 - Report this comment

The "incentive", as you put it, for the Crusades was, generally speaking, was self defense against 400 years of Muslim onslaughts that began a mere three years after the death of Muhammad .... More specifically, it was a defensive counterstroke against a new and dangerous element in the Islamic jihad -- The Seljuqs. They conquered Baghdad in 1055. Fifteen years later, they broke the stalemate that had existed between Islam and Christendom at the Battle of Manzikert (1070) At which point, they invaded the Anatolian Peninsuls and committed genocidal massacres. In twenty years they were at the gates of Constantine. .At the same time Seljuqs started a policy of.harrassing and murdering Christian pilgrim on their way to Jerusalem. And it was this double whammy that led Pope Urban to call upon the people of Western Europe to rally to protect Christendom. ...... So that was the "incentive" for these wars that you want to insinuate was some kind of unjustified war against Islam

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