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Song Parodies -> "Left Side Has Some Borders They Like"

Original Song Title:

"Something 'bout You Baby I Like"

Original Performer:

Status Quo

Parody Song Title:

"Left Side Has Some Borders They Like"

Parody Written by:

Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd

The Lyrics

A YouTube version of the original song can currently be found here.

Can someone explain to me how MSM with a straight face managed to switch from "Hillary's Campaign did absolutely nothing illegal" to "Information about Hillary's secrets was retrieved in an itself illegal manner"? Not only does it make no sense that the Russians (should they have actually digitally hacked her campaign) would then need an oldfashioned analogue physical meeting to deliver any findings, it's also straight up insulting to intelligent viewers/readers to infer that information about what a candidate wants to hide can itself be illegal or legal depending on which way it was brought to the public in the USA. So if that female meeting lawyer had used her somewhat latina looks and entered the states illegally across the Mexican border, then it would suddenly have been totally legal for any media outlet to use the same information? But I'm getting too wordy here, let me frame the whole situation and dilemma in a simpler way:

MSM contradicting logic as of July 2017:
Policy on people: Open the borders - come one, come all!
Policy on information: We need a wall! CLOSE THE BORDERS!
We see them every day
Sliding down the slope of truth
They think they're within leeway
But all I hear is morals - Two!

On info, when it comes to borders, their policy's tight
All coming through illegally's to be shot on sight
Yeah, yeah, the media has some borders they like

They're always smooth talkers
They whirl and pull the wool on you
Just to hide that they're hawks
With an incoherent point of view

On info, journos on the prowl are stalking teenagers' rights
They're hating on the young'uns cos they make'em uptight
Yeah, yeah, the media has their no-fly zone sites

Yeah, yeah, the left side has some borders they like

Now they lawyer up those borders
Arm themselves with cobblestones
Ain't nothing coming over
Such a wall built by large infophobes

On info, they'll have it curbed, and they'll have it trussed
in favour of a scoop on
DONALD'S UNDERWEAR CRUST
Yeah, yeah, the media's making people disgust'

Yeah, yeah, the pundits are with bullshit too stuffed
Yeah, yeah, the truth is being held down and cuffed
Yeah, yeah, the media runs with logic gone bust

© Peter Andersson.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 2.3
How Funny: 2.3
Overall Rating: 2.3

Total Votes: 19

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   13
 13
 13
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   6
 6
 6
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Logician - July 17, 2017 - Report this comment
Nowhere have I seen Hillary's arrogant use of a private server and/or the contents of her hacked e-mails compared to the illegal action of the Trumps in meeting with a Russian agent for the purpose of spreading the fruits of espionage. The latter is consistent in itself, being the desire to subvert the American electoral system, and Hillary in particular. As for the pacing of your parody, I DKTOS and, frankly, I am not inspired to listen to it. However, I do miss the light, impish quality associated with real parody. The 1s you got are not mine.
Logician - July 17, 2017 - Report this comment
Just goes to show that the Russians have concluded from their own hacking operations that digital communications are so insecure that a face-to-face conversation at Trump Tower better insures privacy.
Lost in Translation - July 17, 2017 - Report this comment
You write "Not only does it make no sense that the Russians (should they have actually digitally hacked her campaign) would then need an oldfashioned analogue physical meeting to deliver any findings... " But our intelligence community avers with certainty that Hillary's campaign was hacked to a pulp by the Russians, Hillary was investigated to a fair-thee-well and cleared, and the e-mails Donald Jr. turned over have, on one very explicit subject line, the request for an old-fashioned meeting to dish the dirt on Clinton. Junior replied that he "loved" the idea and the meeting did take place. Yumpin' Yiminy! Maybe there's a flaw in the translation from Fact to Swedish!
Oldtimer - July 17, 2017 - Report this comment
God Bless the MSM and the courageous journalists who exposed Watergate and another crooked presidency, the Pentagon Papers and a crooked war, and Abu Ghraib. The Fourth Estate, at it honorable best, is the real defender of good government and our freedom.
Factoid - July 17, 2017 - Report this comment
Swedish men can't even defend their women from Muslim rapists. Try fixing that situation before telling us about American democracy and the MSM.
Peter Andersson - July 18, 2017 - Report this comment
Watergate was some good old fashioned journalism. Abu Ghraib was some good wikileaks journalism. Would Hillary be a better overseas ally of Swedish women than Trump? Not a chance! Thank God that someone, whoever that was, is still working to do good journalism type work and hacked the secrets she wanted to hide from the voters! (By the way, what was the particular secret leaked in the last fourteen days that handed the election to Trump? I only seem to remember that MSM now darling Comey was publicly re-opening the criminal investigation on her and her campaign's shady digital behaviour - and that didn't feel particularly new, everyone not totally glued to degenerating leftside propaganda screens had already heard about it for years, hadn't they?)
And another contradiction - Thanks Lost in Translation - July 18, 2017 - Report this comment
"Hillary's campaign was hacked to a pulp by the Russians"
Therefore the DNC is the best choice to defend us from the Russians!
Lost in Translation - July 18, 2017 - Report this comment
^ Nobody – but NOBODY – on this thread showed any favor for the candidacy of Hillary Clinton. You are just a schmuck who either can't read or who invented something vaguely resembling a contradiction. I want you to remember always: You are just a S-C-H-M-U-C-K.
Oldtimer - July 18, 2017 - Report this comment
Peter, I hope you eventually come to realize, in a personal way, the real journalistic value of hacking when an Assange acolyte drains your life's savings from your online accounts. In the meantime, you might want to start taking Factoid's advice.
Smycken!
Peter Andersson - July 18, 2017 - Report this comment
"Hillary's campaign was hacked to a pulp by the Russians" is an actual quote from Lost in Translation's first comment on this parody song - and the fact that apparently it's still open to general interpretation as whether or not that kind of failed security accomplishment is a pro-democrat argument or not is kind of a sign o' the times, or at least the state o' the news media. Would you vote someone for National Dog Catcher on the merits of having been some Siberian Husky's little beatch? ;-)

But enough with the name calling, it's summertime, while the MSM continues to spew its (unfortunately somehow still profitable) cognitive dissonance and what Scott Adams calls "Two movies on one screen" I'll take a dive into working on cooler parody subjects for a while. Thanks for reading and voting! :-)
Elizabet - July 18, 2017 - Report this comment
^ lura
Lost in Translation - July 18, 2017 - Report this comment
It's abundantly clear that that the Trumpsters here on this right-wing site are thoroughly obsessed with Hillary. Neither I nor anyone else has written a brief in her favor, and yet you rant about her imaginary failure as President. I suppose then, because she has driven you crazy, she won the 2016 election. Trump won nothing but an opportunity for eternal ignominy, which he is realizing in spectacular fashion.
Peter Andersson - July 18, 2017 - Report this comment
Another hasty conclusion from LiT and really NOT fair to the owner of the site - he runs this as a come one, come all project and the first author to reach 1000 songs was William Tong, definitely not a right-winger, and personally invited to post his stuff here, check for yourself:

http://www.amiright.com/parody/authors/williamtong.shtml
Peter Andersson (being fair and balanced) - July 18, 2017 - Report this comment
Correction: William wrote more than 1000 mostly newt- and dubya-bashing parodies before he quit, but Malcolm Higgins (RIP) was the first to post 1000 here on Amiright.
Lost in Translation - July 18, 2017 - Report this comment
This is a "de facto" right wing site. I'm not one of those collectors of numbers – just a hard-working parodist – but it's easy to see that the toxic wind blows from the right.
Agrimorfee - July 18, 2017 - Report this comment
As a contributor for over two decades here and a consistently long-suffering Democratic voter, I highly protest LiT's uninformed and insulting description of this website as "right-wing". A website overrun with loud-mouthed right-wingers, yes, but not a "right-wing'" website.
Lost in Translation - July 18, 2017 - Report this comment
Agrimorfee: I fail to see the practical difference between a de facto right-wing website and a website overrun with loud-mouthed right-wingers. It is a distinction without a difference. It is impossible to quantify the numbers of "lefties" and "righties," but one would have to be blind not to see that the tone of this site is heavily weighted to the alt-right and the religious right. Hillary, now a private citizen, is the perennial bete noire here. I'll double down on my so-called uninformed insult: when the subject is not eggnog or cartoons, this website is a fount of Trumpian hate and obscenity.
Claude Prez - July 18, 2017 - Report this comment
Peter and Agri: As someone who knows the history of this site as well as you both do, can you really blame this guy for what he thinks? On the one hand, I applaud Chucky's longtime tolerance of all views, but when you do nothing to encourage quality and everything to encourage quantity, you shouldn't be surprised to see your site dominated by a giant sh*tting contest. And if the main sh*tter happens to be have a politically charged pov (and apparently an endless supply of sockpuppets) -- well, it's his site and he allowed it to happen. I (and I imagine many others) would love to come back from time to time, but what's the point, with that psycho allowed to run things? haha, security code: yru....well, because I'm sad, that's why. Ah, well, at least I can feel this last tinge of nostalgia passing
Rob Arndt - July 18, 2017 - Report this comment
Please, stereotyping isn't justified here. By eggnog and cartoons I'm sure you want that translated into either Jonathan or Jonathan and myself. That's inaccurate. There are plenty of other authors here who have written about "cartoons or adult animation" ; who write about video games constantly; who write about toys, and so on. Then there are the old vet pervs who slip past the censor and probably all the old vets have written toilet humor too. I agree that this site is firmly in Republican hands with a few standout Democrats like MP and Jeff from VA to name two. I get bombed with anything pro-Trump or anti-Hillary and yet the number of 5s heavily outweigh them. Same for other right-wing authors. The numbers don't lie. As for religious right... not able to say because so few ever write about Christianity or religion in general. Most sites anywhere on the Internet are atheist heavy in my experience. And btw, as a right-wing hawk, I write parodies about both parties and most Presidents, candidates, members of Congress, etc... I am an equal opportunity offender ;-)
Peter Andersson - July 19, 2017 - Report this comment
The sanest way to label one's own political leanings seems to me to be to think about it as a snapshot in time and place, allowing oneself the future right to change it (again) should new circumstances arise or too many apples rot on the branches of the tree under which one is currently seeking solace. Few things scare me more than people that totally lock in on an ideology/religion already during their puberty and then never allow themselfes to utter even a doubt for the next seventyfive years no matter what goes wrong. Fail forward when you lose, don't lose the lesson too.

I'm currently a somewhat supportive member of the Swedish Pirate Party (which by American standards would sit clearly to the left of the Democrats on most issues), mainly because they're the only ones here who tries to launch a serious discussion about if the rise in unemployment due to the technologial evolution necessitates universal basic income for future generations, or possibly faster than that. There's no agreement of course, but at least it makes me feel that I'm onboard with something ahead of the curve.

Political parodies are all in all a small part of my discography here, written mostly to kickstart my muse on those rare occasions when I'm on a writer's block on all other subjects, have time for it and a writing itch to scratch. During my fifteen years I've been in Camp Anti-Bush, associated with Camp Anti-Teabagging and now I'm currently in Camp Anti-AntiTrumpAngledNews because I don't like their non-stop mindless click-bait bullying of him and I'm a firm believer in that if the old saying "be careful what you wish for, it might come true" has any advical value then also follows that "be careful what things you warn about, if your own alternative crashes to the ground those warnings will retroactively become pro-arguments".

Maybe Amiright would be better off without political parodies, but the "majority" of such submissions have swung back and forth before and I don't see any reason that won't happen again. A fifty-fifty ratio would of course be optimal, but over the long run I think we've had that and will continue to have that. I too applaud Chucky's longtime tolerance of all views.
Rob Arndt - July 19, 2017 - Report this comment
I looked up this Claude Prez and had to go pretty low to find his paltry 130 submissions over an 11 year period and with mediocre ratings. Then the guy shows up in the comments section 3 more years later dredging up old parodies of his buddies and criticizing me for my productions. Well CP, I have close to 750 individual artists of all genres spanning roud folk index songs through the 2010s. I've written on topics no one had ever written of before and displayed my depth of knowledge and experience. I too have blocks of some songs but am no different than your JAB of yesteryears past who did the same. He has over 500 spells from SJH and I have over 800. He has over 4500 parodies and I will exceed 4000 in months. Only I did it in little over 6 years, not over a decade or more and I broke Fragments too. Add 4257 entertainment submissions and you get the picture. I broke most of the records here and post everyday as TCOP and JN do. Who are you to me? Nobody. Go write some new parodies if you can think up anything and mind your own business. This site was compromised before I ever got here in 2011 and I prevent no one from coming back or writing daily. You have a nostalgia problem. Too bad, life goes on.
Peter Andersson - July 19, 2017 - Report this comment
Rob: That was unnecessary. Claude is a several times winner and often medalist in the now on-hold Song Of The Month contests, for which he (if my memory serves me right) was the originator and moderator slash vote-counter over the first years. He has ALWAYS advocated a slow submission rate, strictest possible pacing and quality over quantity to EVERYONE, including me during some several parodies in a week bouts back in the day. He's on my shortlist of people I've learned the most from here, whom I have to thank for upping my own game, and it's always a welcomed treat when he comes out of retirement to grace us oldtimers with a new piece.
Agrimorfee - July 19, 2017 - Report this comment
Well said, Peter and Claude. Now excuse me while I slink back into the shadows...
Phil Alexander - July 19, 2017 - Report this comment
Thing is, Rob, every single one of Claude's parodies would generate more laughs than all of yours put together: he is one of this site's best ever contributors. Why do you always feel the need to belittle others' output?
Lost in Translation - July 19, 2017 - Report this comment
L. Ron Hubbard, the paranoid schizophrenic, pathological liar, and fugitive from justice who founded Scientology, published 1,084 fiction and non-fiction works. On the other hand, Ernest Hemingway published only seven novels in his lifetime. Therefore, going by the infallible criterion of numbers, Hubbard wins. What he wins is for you to figure out, Rob.
Peter Andersson - July 19, 2017 - Report this comment
Lost in Translation: Why don't you head over to William Tong's 1000 parody songs (link above) to see if you can improve them then? The starting point should be easy, look for titles with the names Newt and Bush and replace those with Trump and Pence, they're all one syllable names. Balance the imagined alt-right-siteness that upsets you so much with say one such parody a day - but remember to give William full credit if you can't change up the whole rest of the parody too.
Lost in Translation - July 19, 2017 - Report this comment
Peter: I do not write political parodies, and I can't suffer the vile invective of political fanatics – almost all of whom emerge from the Right. I would not tamper with Mr. Tong's parodies, but how about this, inspired by The Beatles:

Now that I’m older – seventy-eight,
I don’t have a care,
Pardon me if you should see me on a toot,
All-night benders in a pink suit.

I have a certain longevity:
Only six years more.
Will you still hug me, will you still drug me,
When I’m eighty-four?

Carisoprodol
Makes you feel real good.
I could have a ball.

I should be eating animal fat,
Kale does no more good.
Make me a nice dessert of Flexeril,
Ev’ry day a new-colored pill.

Downing a Xanax, puffing on weed,
Sleeping with a whore,
Will you still hug me, will you still drug me,
When I’m eighty-four?

You can mix my Smirnoff with diazepam
For that extra kick, if we’re out of horse.
What the hell’s the diff?
One nostril for cocaine,
One for glue to sniff.

Anti-depressants, pain-killers, too,
I must ask of you.
We can get delivery from 9 to 3,
Courtesy of Sam’s Pharmacy.

Years that are golden should be a joy,
Not a sober bore.
Will you still hug me, will you still drug me,
When I’m eighty-four?
CML - July 19, 2017 - Report this comment
Enough with this nonsense that ALL the nasty invective comes from the right. Wanna see some vile, deranged crap coming fro the left Check the comments to any political parody I did from late 2013 to mid-2015 .... And as for the site being "overrun" by right wing fanatics -- I've done maybe 10 political parodies since 2014; you'll get about 10-15 parodies a year from Onslaught and Cry Havoc. And Arndt has done numerous parodies LATELY. Of course there's the huge numbers of one-bombs that hit left wing parodies, but we all know that's the work of a small number of people .. as opposed to 20 or 30 fanatics
CML - July 19, 2017 - Report this comment
And if you want to see some true foaming-at-the-mouth vileness, check out the comments to my triumphal "If Buckwheat Sang I Put a Spell on You" from June of 2015 and then come back and tell me how right wingers are ruining this site ... BTW, to whoever was the commander of the sock puppet army that wrote all those comments ... I never read the last half of those comments, but I have shown all of them to people who try to claim that all the viciousness is coming from the right
Claude Prez - July 19, 2017 - Report this comment
Wow, so much going on here I hardly know where to begin! Oh, of course! Good parody, Peter -- I’m not big on politics and DKTOS, but since you provided the handy link, I enjoyed it very much. “DONALD'S UNDERWEAR CRUST” was particularly hilarious. Also, thank you (and Phil) for the very nice compliments. Lost in Translation: Great point about L.Ron Hubbard. Fantastic, actually. And by posting your parody, I’m assuming you’re Al Silver? If so, I’m a fan -- “My Favorite Flicks” was terrific, and I particularly enjoyed the “Some Like It Hot” gag. I really wish you’d discovered this site sooner; you would’ve fit in very well and enjoyed it a lot, back in the day. Rob: The quality vs. quantity debate has gone on as long as this site has existed. As Peter indicated, I’ve never been a fan of the quantity game, but it’s not my site and I’ve always assumed Chucky had good reasons for incentivizing quantity. I get it: you discover the site, see the Parody Authors list, and envision your name at the top. It’s exciting, it gives you a goal, whatever. It always bugged me when someone like Malcolm (RIP), who was very funny and talented, spent his time cranking out mediocre stuff when he really could have written some great parodies. But mainly, his prodigious output diluted the efforts of others. People like Spaff, for example, who spent six months writing “Shakespearean Pie” -- a legitimate achievement, IMO, and if reading the actual parody doesn’t convince you, well, take a look at the comment section on that song. Dozens of ACTUAL REAL PEOPLE telling him with great enthusiasm what a magnificent parody it is. I bet you’d love to experience that. But we both know you never will. So here’s my advice to you, for what it’s worth: Keep writing your sh*tty Barney parodies. Overtake John A. Barry -- I have nothing against John, but anyone who writes that quickly has to know the odds of his stuff being truly worthwhile aren’t very good. You can and will be the king of quantity here. Nobody is disputing that. But for the love of all that is holy, please stop with the voting and commenting. You’re not fooling anybody. Quality stuff takes real talent -- and time. You apparently have none of the former and choose to spend the latter on quantity. You’re making a fool of yourself; you’re a laughingstock. A train wreck. Claude out.
Claude Prez - July 19, 2017 - Report this comment
Crap. John, if you see this, I apologize; I got carried away.
Al Silver - July 19, 2017 - Report this comment
You nailed me easily, of course, Claude. Yesterday, after you described His Nibs as "psycho," I gratefully looked you up and what did I find? Talent! The line "When you wash a porno star" is, at first, just an eccentric juxtaposition of the Disney sublime with the sex show ridiculous. But a second glance reveals the wicked accuracy of the lyric tracking. You caught the mirth and lightness of Parody.
I certainly wish, too, that I would have discovered this site when writers like you and TT presided and I was a mere stripling of 70. In a few weeks I will turn 83, going on 84. My parodies of the only songs I know – those that were written in the Golden Age – get a big DKTOS here. I have to get another hobby. Hey, wait a minute. You gave me an idea. Maybe me starring in 16 mm. films for bachelorette parties... "All right, Mr. DeMille. I'm ready for my money shot."
By the way, I'm sure JAB leads the examined life and recognizes his shortcomings. He'll be back with his best.
Claude Prez - July 20, 2017 - Report this comment
Thank you Al. Will keep an eye out for your stuff whenever I'm around

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