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Song Parodies -> "The Turkey Song"

Original Song Title:

"The Chicken Song"

Original Performer:

Spitting Image: Philip Pope, Rob Grant and Doug Na

Parody Song Title:

"The Turkey Song"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

It's the time of year
Now that Spring is getting close
All that Christmas food
Starts to smell and decompose
For the fridge is stuffed
With what's left from holidays
The bits you hate, hate, hate
Now exude a purple haze

From the sitting room
To the garden shed as well
No matter where you hide
You cannot escape the smell

Turkey in the fridge
And it's tickling your nose
See the christmas pud
Changing into something gross
Here is lemonade
That no longer has its fizz
There is something green
But you don't know what it is

Skin two inches thick
That is covering the cream
It's so flaming tough
Use it for a trampoline
There is slime galore
The salami's growing ears
The casserole began
To start opening your beers

The cling film is dissolving
The Christmas ham's revolving
I think that it's evolving
To something else again...

Turkey in the fridge
And it's getting up your nose
Hear it glug and ooze
Starting to metamorphose
Now there's tentacles
That are opening the door
And a trail of slime
Heading cross your kitchen floor...

It's got lemon eyes
It's got tendrils that were bread
A tomato nose
On a mouldy pumpkin head
Think it ate the cat
And dissolved the microwave
And though you try to run
It's too late... you can't be saved

Keep yourself alive
Running upstairs to the shower
It comes through the plug-
Hole, it's starting to devour....
And there's no escape
Think it's time for you to die
Luckily you wake
"It was all a dream", you sigh

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 21

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   20

User Comments

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Red Ant - January 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Many funny lines, including "The salami's growing ears", 'tentacles' and "Think it ate the cat".
karen - February 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Excellent parody philbo
Agrimorfee - February 09, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) How many people here have heard the OS? I have...and this is a worthy re-examination. I hope someone can find an mp3, it's great all by itself! 555
Cat - February 09, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Great stuff Phil, leftovers truly are the instruments of the devil. I was able to find the lyrics on a website, and now I absolutely HAVE to hear the OS.
Max Power - February 09, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM)-Funny stuff Phil.
Adagio - February 10, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) A funny one. 5's
Confission - February 10, 2006 - Report this comment
the worst thing about lemonade losing its fizz is that first you start thinking, "oh my, it's losing its fizz." then you think, "wait, lemonade isn't even supposed to have fizz!" i wish my salami would grow ears because i'm getting pretty tired of it not listening to me. anyway, very good, with some cleverly funny lines and likable characters, such as the highly charismatic casserole
bobpiecheese - February 10, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) DKTOS, but I like it. It's similiar to 'Livin' in the Fridge' by Weird Al himself.
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - February 11, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM - I have never heard TOS before, but from what I can tell it can be found (as a Real Player file) here:
Red Ant - February 12, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I gave Peter's link a listen (couldn't d/l it, just left click to play, but it works fine), same song I remember hearing a long time ago. Pleasure to revisit this one Phil, and now I know where all those beers went (I wonder what the casserole did with the bottles!)
Matthias - February 22, 2006 - Report this comment
The funniest song this month sorry guys but this song with it's lines takes the cake... expecially the line "salami's growing ears"
Johnny D - February 26, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) "...dissolved the microwave..." Truly a high-tech-blechh!
wannabemustangjockey - February 28, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I've heard of dinner being a horror story, but this *ahem* takes the cake.
Larry Hensley - March 01, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Do NOT go in there. 555s
Jeff Reuben - March 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Glad I stopped by to check this out, this was brilliant! Congrats on a well-earned SOTM gold!
Robert Halosman - March 03, 2006 - Report this comment
"Chicken" immitation of: "Grillz" by nelly Rob the chicken store and tell 'em make me 'dem barbecue chicken... I got dem stuck in my teeth, stuck up my gums, all around my bum. I got buffalo wing, BBQ sauce, tenders too. I might be fattened up nicely w/ my wife beat, on south beach, OH!.in my white tee. Give me bone, and i throw it up. mY GRANDMAMA HATE IT BUT MY new MAMA LOVE IT. WHAT?!?!? Smile 4 me man, what u lookin at? I wanna see ur chicks, u wanna see me BBQ?!?!?!?! YA YA UR B...BB..B.Q. rOB THE BUTCHER AND TELL HIM "COOK ME A CHI-CKEN"! SMILE 4 ME MAN, I WANNA SEE UR CHICKS. MY-MY MY MY CHICKEN TENDERS?!? YA UR CHICKS-CHICK-CHICK-EN TENDERS AND GET 2 THE BUTCHER.
Eli - April 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Great parody very clever
JANUARY 2006 SONG OF THE MONTH - April 09, 2006 - Report this comment
First Place,16819.30.html
Gav Powell - May 27, 2006 - Report this comment
Superb, a deserving winner of Song of the Month. surely Phil has established himself as a premier parodist on this site now. - July 03, 2006 - Report this comment
I'll eventually catch up on all the SOTM winners I've missed. Fun stuff, Philbo, even if you didn't title it "Fridge Odour Troubled Walter." Bonus points for dissolving/revolving/evolving. And to Gav Powell: Surely Phil did that, like, five years ago.
somebody - November 23, 2006 - Report this comment
aint that bad
Stuart McArthur - March 19, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTY) great lines Phil - esp. The casserole began To start opening your beers - and a great idea/subject too - 555
Rick C - March 30, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTY) Sheer poetry, Philbo :-) Excellent write! LOL at Spaff's line too.
Below Average Dave - March 31, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTY) I don't think I've ever read a Thanksgiving parody prior to this one. . .EXCELLENT JOB and despite some of the lines, in general, I am actually hungry.
Phil Alexander - April 02, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks everybody Stu - this is an idea I've used a few times (the first being "Fridge Odour Troubled Walter", as pointed out by Spaff, there are two sequels as well: "I can't find the freezer any more" (I can't fight the feeling any more) and "Smell comes through the Plug-hole" (Welcome to the jungle)... this one doesn't fit in that story, though; unless it's a prequel, I guess. Technically, Dave, this wasn't a Thanksgiving parody: this side of the pond, we eat turkey for Christmas. Hence the release of this one in January :-)
charlotte - June 07, 2019 - Report this comment
OH MY GOD!i was drinking milk when i read thia and it totally came out of my nose

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