Sitting in the front seat
Of a self-driving car
Even though I was in the front seat
I thought I'd go no far
But near Dunkin' Donuts
Hit the brakes to stop a crash
Richard Marx said, "You took my parking space, little bee-yatch!"
Oh no

It was 5 p.m. and not dark
But he had his brights on!

Chorus:
So they towed his Hummer
When I told the cops
Yeah they towed his Hummer
Thank God that he was stopped
When they towed his Hummer
It turned green and blew up
Yeah they towed the Hummer
Of a guy famous for his screw-ups

Said, "That's what you get
Covered 'Baby Got Back'"*
Clearly he'd been drinking
'Cause he slurred his words and coughed and hacked
It's never who
But what it is I know
I told the cops about this, he said, "Sir, we need to go"

Noticed it was Earth Day, I thought
"That's a gas-guzzling car he's got!"

(Chorus)

Parking lots can be so angry
You're almost never gonna want to drive
When there are cops on duty
They're looking for bad drivers
Doesn't matter if you're famous or not

The policeman says,
"It's OK, he's in the clink"
So the lesson he must learn here
Is if you're gonna drive, don't drink
I wanted to scream
But I had to keep it all inside
When the cops are still on duty
They just act like someone died, oh no
It was 5 p.m. and not dark
But he had his brights on!

(Chorus)

Towed his Hummer
Towed his Hummer, it burst