When you're regaling friends
with gushing tales
About your Stedman pal
and girlfriend Gail
You need a wake-up call
and must be told
"The fandom of the Oprah Winfrey's wayyyy
out of control!"

You're stalking Rachel Ray
to cook your meals
You give the New York Times
your "Thumbs-Up" seal
You train your kids to say
"My Mom, The Queen"
The fandom of the Oprah Winfrey's gone
to far extremes

You're giving cars away
that you don't own
You call Bill Gates to ask
"You need a loan?"
You bring a camera crew
To subway trips
The fandom of the Oprah Winfrey's
Got you in its grip!

You're playing therapist
to office mates
You're sharingf T.M.I .*
about your weight
If this is even close,
may I suggest
The fandom of the Oprah Winfrey
needs a little rest!