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Song Parodies -> "He's Not on His Knees"

Original Song Title:

"She Can't Find Her Keys"

Original Performer:

Paul Peterson

Parody Song Title:

"He's Not on His Knees"

Parody Written by:

Glenn Walker

The Lyrics

It might not be sporting to go back to 1962 to find an obscure song that peaked at #19. But when the parody line “He’s Not on His Knees” occurred to me, it just seemed too perfect. I dedicate this song to the millions of Christian women - and men too, I suppose, but likely more prevalent among women - who found out too late that they had confused their boyfriend’s participations in spiritual activities with actually being Spirit-led. This can be especially present when the conversion is recent, and it is becoming increasingly evident that “unless I accept Christ – and soon – there will be no wedding.” It isn’t generally a scam; I suspect in most cases, the party himself was self-deceived. I present this with hope that couples not yet married will consider the distinction prayerfully.
When I'm with the man that I adore
My desire is that he know the Lord
My Pa-PA is just about to yell
He says, "Darling, as far as I can tell:"
He says he is just a tease
He's not on his knees
And here's what happens when I ask what he believes
He says he
Reads the Bible every day and every night
(But he's not on his knees)
Tithes and gives to every cause that is in sight
(But he's not on his knees)
Teaches Sunday School, a drink a smoke it isn't cool
He does not need these
But I'm standing here still without a wedding date
Cause he's not on his knees
Sha da sha da sha da he's not on his knees

I give up go upstairs to my room
Praying that we will be bride and groom
Next day he goes witnessing and then
It all starts happening again
He says he is just a tease
He's not on his knees
And here's what happens when I ask what he believes

He says he
Went to Europe just to preach the Gospel there
(But he's not on his knees)
Learned Italian just to show how much he cares
(But he's not on his knees)
Went to college graduated Magna Cum in Divinities
But I'm standing here still without a wedding date
Cause he's not on his knees

But she's standing here still without a wedding date
Cause he's not on his knees

He says he
Goes to Church and joined the choir, he hosed down the Church on fire
Told his boss God wasn't pleased to hear him shout obscenities
Moved a mountain, made it rain, counseled people, cured their pain
Pulled the Pastor from the lake, Papa, hear me as I quake
[Papa]: BUT HE'S NOT ON HIS KNEES!

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Total Votes: 14

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