-> "88 Lines About 44 Presidents"
Original Song Title:
"88 Lines About 44 Women"
Parody Song Title:
"88 Lines About 44 Presidents"
Washington was first to serve
Father of our country
Adams followed in his steps
After he was first V.P.
Jefferson doubled our homeland
Nothing more did he "declare"
Madison said, "Hello, Dolly"
1812, the rockets glared
Monroe protects Americas
Says, "There's a Doctrine in the house"
Quincy Adams screwed-up big time
John, his dad, said, "What a louse!"
Jackson "let the people rule"
But, since we don't, he was to blame
Van Buren made the Treasury system
Had no cash, so things stayed same
William Henry Harrison
Serve thirty days then dropped down dead
Tyler went and annexed Texas
Got the Mexicans seeing red
Polk then tried for California
Went to war 'til satisfied
Taylor was "Ol' Rough and Ready"
Didn't do much but he tried
Fillmore sought a "compromise"
In politics, that's quite a switch
Pierce let new states choose for slavery
Much like Mildred (what a bitch!)
Buchannan tried to keep the union
But he couldn't get his way
Lincoln fought to save this country
Should've never seen that play
Andrew Johnson was impeached
But, thanks to one vote, kept his stand
Grant's two reigns were chaotic
Told Greely, "Go to hell, old man!"
Hayes then ended Reconstruction
That was all he got around
Garfield served until September
Jealous voter shot him down
Arthur wanted lower tarriffs
That set all the world with glee
Cleveland didn't do too much
In his first Presidency
Ben Harrison from O-hi-o
Split Dakota right in two
Cleveland got his title back
And broke a Pullman's strike or two
(Oh, yeah...that was the twenty-FOURTH President, not the twenty-second)
McKinley fought a war with Spain
Shot right down in Buffalo
Teddy Roosevelt "rough-rode"
Through his terms, but "beared" it, though
Taft was Chief Supreme Court Justice
After starting income taxes
Wilson "kept us out of war"
Til U-boats made us kick their asses!
Harding tossed the League of Nations
What did HE term "normalcy"?
Coolidge put a farm bill down
Then ended his candidacy
Hoover got us through Depression
Long before Prozac was in
FDR got four terms running
Polio's what did him in
Truman got to nuke Japan
Korea then he did surrate
Eisenhower led up NATO
Called himself a moderate
Kennedy went down in Dallas
Paradise for Ol'ver Stone
LBJ took care of homelands
"Great Society" got boned
Nixon had his Watergate
Resigned before he could get caught
Ford gave "Tricky Dick" a pardon
One big "trip" is what HE got
Carter handled things abroad
Left the U.S. suffering
Reagan boosted our defense
Could not remember one damn thing
Bush took on Saddam Hussein
But "no new taxes" sent him home
Clinton balanaced out the budget
Slept with interns while alone
Dubya Bush was like his dad
You're the last one on this list!
88 lines about 44 Presidents
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