There are thugs in the world, there are villains
There are minions and sidekicks and then
There are those that simply are decoys, but
I've never been one of them

I'm an evil henchman
They brought me in for episode four
And the one thing they say about henchmen is
The kingpin will always have more

You don't need to know the arch villain
You don't need to know your own name
You don't need to know you're complicit
You're a henchman, and we're all the same, because

Every goon gets wasted
Every goon is late
Ne'er a goon's existed
Past his shoot-by date

Every goon gets wasted
Every goon is late
Ne'er a goon's existed
Past his shoot-by date

There will always be spares
Scattered all around
Gory death will come to
Each goon when he is found

Every goon gets wasted
Every goon's dead wood
Every goon has tasted
His or her own blood

Radical extremists,
Or dodgy business guys
Soon Jack will put a bullet
Right between their eyes

Every goon gets wasted
Every goon is late
Ne'er a goon's existed
Past his shoot-by date

Every goon gets wasted
Every goon's dead wood
Every goon has tasted
His or her own blood

Every goon is useless
Every goon sees lead
Coming rather swiftly
Straight towards his head

Let the agents torture
And cause us lots of pain
We're just minor hold-ups
Each goon shall soon be slain

Every goon gets wasted
Every goon's dead wood
Every goon has tasted
His or her own blood

Every goon gets wasted
Every goon is late
Ne'er a goon's existed
Past his shoot-by date