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Song Parodies -> "The Camp That Doesn't Rock"
Original Song Title:
"The Thing That Should Not Be"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Metallica
Parody Song Title:
"The Camp That Doesn't Rock"
Parody Written by:
Edward Genereux
The Lyrics
I am taking a break from writing my disco opera "TCU." Instead, my 78th parody is a deservedly harsh critique of the Disney Channel Not-So-Original Movie "Camp Rock" and its sequel, "The Final Jam," which should have been called the Final Sham and came out just two months ago. Given Disney's tendencies, it would not be surprising if there were a Camp Rock 3 to continue a series of Disney musicals even worse than High School Musical.
In the year 2008,
Disney Channel took the bait:
Make a summer camp movie
With the JoBros and Demi.
It's a stretch to even say
That this film is truthfully okay.
There's no rock, it's all just pop
And hip-hop, with a little rap in this B-film.
Walt Disney, in his grave he turns.
Whither Led Zeppelin today?
Disney's in full-blast decay.
Jon-Ass Sisters think they rock,
When their music's really schlock.
Boycott this, both one and two.
If one more comes out, that just won't do.
I want Megadeth to rule
Both Camp Rock and Camp Star to boot and then declare
The camps sham; Disney has blasphemed.
(Long instrumental solo)
Camp Wars was a vote of farce;
I would have had some true rock stars
Slay all of those of the schlock
Of the camp that doesn't rock.
Dave Mustaine, you have the right
To charge down the Jo-Bros in this fight.
Mitchie, Tess and all the others
We'll impale on the flagpost of their own shit-camp.
This Camp Rock, such madness it is.
Disney Channel took the bait:
Make a summer camp movie
With the JoBros and Demi.
It's a stretch to even say
That this film is truthfully okay.
There's no rock, it's all just pop
And hip-hop, with a little rap in this B-film.
Walt Disney, in his grave he turns.
Whither Led Zeppelin today?
Disney's in full-blast decay.
Jon-Ass Sisters think they rock,
When their music's really schlock.
Boycott this, both one and two.
If one more comes out, that just won't do.
I want Megadeth to rule
Both Camp Rock and Camp Star to boot and then declare
The camps sham; Disney has blasphemed.
(Long instrumental solo)
Camp Wars was a vote of farce;
I would have had some true rock stars
Slay all of those of the schlock
Of the camp that doesn't rock.
Dave Mustaine, you have the right
To charge down the Jo-Bros in this fight.
Mitchie, Tess and all the others
We'll impale on the flagpost of their own shit-camp.
This Camp Rock, such madness it is.
As I alluded in the lyrics, I would like to have an alternate ending wherein Megadeth frontman Dave Mustaine declares the "Camp Wars" a sham and proceeds with his fellow headbangers to butcher the campers and staff while playing real rock.
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This was truly righteous. I absolutely despise neo-Disney, and Camp Rock is a definite misnomer. I mean come on, ROCK? it's just pure stinking pop garbage! Metallica kicks so much ass it's not even funny. But let's not forget, this is what the 7-8-9 year old crowd thinks is rock. Great parody, looks like the sandman will be seeing you 555 times.
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