No more balls to chase, he says it's just a waste
He is my anal obstruction
No more lazy shade, he's gone for higher praise
Of overworked and overstressed productions

( Trust me, you will see
Fame is all you need
A glamorized show pooch
Is what I see in you, so )

( Start prancing faster
Obey your master
Do these turns faster
Strut for your master )

The master of puppies is pulling my string!
Pinching my fur and prodding my thing
Blocked by his thighs, I just can't see a thing
Knocked on my butt, it's humiliating

(Don't bark at me, or you'll hear me scream!)

Master, bastard

Auditioning his way, I'd love to betray
Life of flashbulbs becoming clearer
Tired of skipping rope, listening to this dope
I'd like to serve his gonads on a mirror

( Hear me, you will see
Applause is all you need
A dedicated star
Who gave up chasing cars, so )

( Start dancing faster
You owe your master
Get off the grass, er
Get on this task, er )

The master of puppies is yanking my string!
Smacking my head, shoving me through a ring
Caught 'tween his legs, I can't do anything
I hope to dog heaven he won't make me sing

(Don't growl at me, or you'll hear me scream!)

Master, bastard
Where's the treat that I've been after?
Master, bastard
I've worn your suits and ties

Laughter, laughter
All I see and hear is laughter
Laughter, laughter
Laughing at this guy

( Never mind all that
This is your habitat
Dog crowds, dog judges, and dog critics
Training on for days, standing up for praise
My first blue ribbon prize will stump the cynics )

( I will fix your tie
I will clean your eyes
I will live through you
I need attention too )

( I'm the pup master, I'm pulling your string
Spoiled by treats, you just won't do a thing... )

Controlling dog show bastard!
Why don't you go get plastered
If it's my life your after
Why don't you be an actor?