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Song Parodies -> "There's a guy works down the corner shop's in ISIS"

Original Song Title:

"Chip Shop"

Original Performer:

Kirsty MacColl

Parody Song Title:

"There's a guy works down the corner shop's in ISIS"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

So.. it seems that there's people from the UK and other Western countries going off to fight for the latest bunch of extremists in the Middle East (originally known as "Islamic State In Syria", or ISIS, but with a few variations since); oddly enough, it seems that some/most of these young men were barely religious before joining the jihad, even going so far as to borrow "Islam for Dummies" from the library.. so that they could sound convincing to their new comrades, presumably
Oh, Yusuf what you gone and done?
Just saw you with a gun, on Newsnight
You seemed to be a normal lad
But you've gone bad and it ain't right

The booze you've drunk, the fags you've smoked
So who'd've known your cohones were steel ones
Down at the pub, thought you were nice
But you've been seen beheading guys
And you've been swapping Jaeger bombs for real ones

There's a guy works down the corner shop's in ISIS
Allah-u-akhbar! A hullabaloo
There's a guy works down the corner shop's in ISIS
If your god's so great, I'm not sure why he needs you

So, when did you get radical?
You used to sing with Arsenal fans at Highbury
But religion was no open book:
You took "Islam for Dummies" from the library

But now you're over in Iraq
And I doubt you're coming back
Except in a coffin
I don't mean to laugh, but.. shit
Why've you been such a brainless twit?
You utter twat, I'll give you that for nothin'

There's a guy works down the corner shop's in ISIS
I saw him on TV it must be true
There's a guy works down the corner shop's in ISIS
When I knew him, was as normal as me or you

There's a guy works down the corner shop's in ISIS
Enjoy your virgins, all seventy-two
There's a guy works down the corner shop's in ISIS
Ciao, au revoir, auf wiedersehen, adieu
Ciao, au revoir, auf wiedersehen, adieu
So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, adieu

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   4

User Comments

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Barry J. Mitchel - September 15, 2014 - Report this comment
Phil, this reminded me of the skits in Monty Python episodes where Brit neighbors were interviewed about a recently unmasked criminal, and all said he had been a nice normal boy. And your multi-lingual farewells highlight the national and ethnic diversity of these novice jihadis who convert to Islam and join the holy cause. 555
Rob Arndt - September 15, 2014 - Report this comment
555, although I disagree with your Introductory comments to the extent of Euro terrorist recruitment by ISIS. France and UK have many Islamists and mosques that support ME terror and which recruit foreign extremists. But as for Germany, the trend is more terror-tourism. Germans are known as much for love of vacationing as for weapons and killing in war, chemicals, heavy machinery, and luxury cars. Probably the best example is hip hop artist Desu Dogg who changed his name and is fighting for ISIS. Other examples are former Bundeswehr that are pissed that the German Govt is reluctant to send German troops into regional wars apart from Peacekeeping. True German foreign Islamists that support medieval warfare are rare. The former E German Soviet weaponry was interesting, but sold or given to E European nations. Germany even gave away their MiG-29s. So joining ISIS gives access to these types of weapons, travel through the ME, and a channel for German aggression under the surface. I base this on German independent research reported by German news. It is not my sole opinion. Der Spiegel also has reported on Nazism alive in the Bundeswehr at many levels and with KSK. FYI

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