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Song Parodies -> "I Bought This Stuff When It Was New"

Original Song Title:

"I Hate Myself For Loving You"

Original Performer:

Joan Jett and the Blackhearts

Parody Song Title:

"I Bought This Stuff When It Was New"

Parody Written by:

Abbott Skelding

The Lyrics

Dedicated to those people who line up outside of stores to get the latest and greatest gadget (not me, I'm not that crazy haha). Original Song:
Midnight, I’m in line, it’s a zoo!
Outside the Best Buy to get something brand new
It looks amazing, this will make me so cool!

Hey man, Apple’s back…they're drawin’ in crowds
Looks really sleek, plenty features abound
Gave them all my dollars, now I’m jumpin’ up and down

Turned on the news, frown at what they say
That just this fall, something new will come our way

I bought this stuff when it was new
Version 3 replacing Version 2
I’d sell it back, but “No refunds for you!”
Oh man, I bought this stuff when it was new

Oh great, out of date, now I’m screwed
New one has features that aren’t on Version 2
They’ll think I’m a loser if I don’t preorder soon

Oh man, new iPad – Version 5!
Skipped over 4, this one was announced last night
Threw this old one away cause they’ll probably skip to 9!

And now this new pile of shiny chrome
Was out of date by the time I brought it home

I bought this stuff when it was new
Now the screen’s like an Etch-a-Sketch tool
My friends all scoff, say “This 8-track’s for you”
But, hey, I bought this stuff when it was new

Turned on the news and feared what they’d say
“Four new came out since what you bought yesterday”

I bought this stuff when it was new
Now 3-D, mines not even at two
I’m just in shock, out of so much cash too!
Because I bought this stuff when it was new!

I bought this stuff when it was new
“Version 3 is like cave paintings, dude!”
I should give up, I don’t know what to do
Because I bought this stuff when it was new

I bought this stuff when it was new
I hate myself for buying new
I bought this stuff when it was new
I hate myself...
I bought this stuff when it was new!

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 16

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   15

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Matthias - June 04, 2012 - Report this comment
I know a bunch of people like this who blow their money just because it's the newest greatest thing and it gets outdated almost instantly. I still have an iPod touch and a old school phone. Not an iPhone not a Droid or any of that craziness.
Porfle Popnecker - June 04, 2012 - Report this comment
I'd get one of these newfangled cell phones, but I like the way my land line doesn't follow me around when I leave the house.
Andria - June 05, 2012 - Report this comment
I love this parody, sums up the insanity of tech faddists. I still have a 2008 iMac (but got sucked into a MacBook Air purchase when my old iBook died about a year ago), bought a 160gb iPod Classic since it was easy to use with a readable display, still use a 2007 Nokia cell phone even though my phone/internet provider has been begging me to buy a new phone, and still have a CRT TV & green appliances dating to the Johnson administration here. 5s.
Jeff Reuben - July 23, 2012 - Report this comment
Fantastic work, I love getting the latest, greatest stuff, but tend to wait until the hype fades, the crowds die down, the bugs are worked out and the prices drop. Great OS too.
Blaydeman - July 29, 2012 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I was never really the person to wait outside a store for the latest and greatest electronics or anything else, but I used to always be up-to-date on all those kinds of things. Now I couldn't really care less. Give me a phone, Ipod, and Ps2 that work, and I'm good. Nice job on this one Abbott.
bobpiecheese - July 31, 2012 - Report this comment
(SOTM) The only reason I got a new phone recently is because I didn't want my morning alarm to be a stupid MIDI. Fantastic parody about the financial dangers of being a tech-head. 555!
Arwen - July 31, 2012 - Report this comment
SOTM...LOVE this...and it's soo true. I always get apple stuff three seconds before the next version comes out. And they do it because people like me always want the newest one, and end up with 5 ipods over the course of a year. hahaha...EXCELLENT work!
Glen S - July 31, 2012 - Report this comment
This works very well for me. Nice slap at all those 'new version now' technologies.
Arwen - February 26, 2013 - Report this comment
SOTY...Still love this. I think 8 new ipads came out while I was reading this. ;)
Max Power - March 30, 2013 - Report this comment
I know, when it comes to a new product, it is important to know that one must never buy the first generation. At the same time, millions will gobble it up but they're sacrifices for the greater good (as in the profits will lead to improved products).
Agrimorfee - April 03, 2013 - Report this comment
Very funny topic idea to match the song title, and you kept it consistently funny throughout, matched the tone of the song as well as the pace.
Blaydeman - April 04, 2013 - Report this comment
(ABC) Bringing back a crowd favorite I see. Good, could I loved reading it again! Still great!
bobpiecheese - April 08, 2013 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above!
Glen S - April 08, 2013 - Report this comment
See above(2.0). Still very funny(3.1). I was up to date when I started writing this comment, but not anymore.
Max Power - March 13, 2016 - Report this comment
See above of what I said about impulsive buying.
Peter Andersson - March 20, 2016 - Report this comment
I don't see any old comment of mine on this one but it seems familiar, did you medal in one of SOTM rounds I wasn't in with it? Anyway, it has obviously stood the test of time and is as good now as when it was new!
Jeff Reuben - March 22, 2016 - Report this comment
Enjoyed this back then, enjoyed it again!
Jeff Reuben - March 22, 2016 - Report this comment
PS: I Liked This Song When It Was New :)
bobpiecheese - March 22, 2016 - Report this comment
(Artistry) See above...again!
Blaydeman - March 26, 2016 - Report this comment
(Artistry) See above

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