all my stocks and bonds went crashing down and lots of my money was lost
i don't want to invest now, its too risky i can't afford the cost
I have the seen the last of my charmed life, and i have seen the last of my wife
I have lots of reasons to frown, since all my stocks and bonds went crashing down

everyone has seen their better days
gambling in vegas is a safer way
instead of getting screwed by the dow
but i can't afford to go now
cause all my stocks and bonds went crashing down

and the stock market hurts more than it used to,
i go to casinos instead of wall st. in the afternoon
i wish i knew what martha stewart knew

hey nobody wants to get screwed by the dow
I did, my stocks and bonds went crashing down

and i think i know what my boss meant when he talked about the 401k
and sticky fingers and greedy hands screwed me out of my retirement day
and now i have to work right up until my dying day

I lost all my money on the dow
when all my stocks and bonds went crashing down
and now i'm stock marketed out.
Yeehaw!