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Song Parodies -> "The Open All Hours Song"

Original Song Title:

"Chocolate Girl"

Original Performer:

Deacon Blue

Parody Song Title:

"The Open All Hours Song"

The Lyrics

If you've never seen it, this is inspired by the 1970s/1980s BBC sitcom Open All Hours . . .
Arkwright opens up all hours
He only thinks of profits
He only loves those customers who spend a lot of money

And he doesn't like spendthrifts
Especially the Black Widow
His groceries are overpriced - no wonder he can't shift them

And Arkwright loves his corner shop
Doesn't like to go out leaving it
He adores his corner shop
Because he's over-priced and stingy and like to overcharge

Arkwright doesn't understand it
Raised young Granville from childhood
But when it comes to brand-new tills, he's only reared a spender

And he only likes to profit
Keeps his change in an old teapot
"Cause if saving gives him so much fun, then parting with it's harder

And Arkwright loves his corner shop
Cannot bear to go out leaving it
His life's work - his corner shop
Because there's decades just of overpricing - it's daylight robbery

Arkwright doesn't understand her
District Nurse - name is Gladys
And he wants to spend the night with her - she won't unless they're married

And he just loves his corner shop
Opens up all hours to make some cash
And he adores his corner shop
Even sabotages Granville's dates to keep him out of trouble

He really loves that corner shop
Worked for years - grocer and errand boy
He adores his corner shop
Granville's overworked and underpaid - he'll never have a girlfriend

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Voting Results

Pacing: 2.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   1
 3   0
 4   0
 5   0

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