I got my first real cell phone
Discount booth at clearance time
Dialed it 'til my fingers bled
A package deal for $99

Man and I thought I was cool
I drove off, but I didn't get far
Heard a crunch and then I felt stupid
I shoulda' known not to talk in the car

Oh but when I look back, wow!
That phone and I just went together
It was mine by choice
Ya - it was light as a feather
I never guessed it'd cause such strife

Ain't no use in not payin'
You'd think I'd have had a clue
Got a billing, late payment notice
And then I read they'd sue!

Sittin' in my kitchen chair
I knew that I would have to sever
That certain phone from my hand
Late bills pilin' up in my ledger
I never guessed it'd cause such strife
A package deal for $99

Man I need a dime
I was dumb and senseless
Some cash I could not find
I guess I wasn't so very clever - not clever - no

And then I hooked up with pagin'
Didn't cost me near as much as cell
So now what I get is a beeping
It just might work, oh you never can tell

Sittin' on my kitchen chair
I'm really glad I did sever
That certain phone from my hand
Late bills pilin' up in my ledger
I never guessed it'd cause such strife
A package deal for $99