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Song Parodies -> "If I had a Rocket Launcher (Telemarketing Version)"

Original Song Title:

"If I had a Rocket Launcher"

Original Performer:

Bruce Cockburn

Parody Song Title:

"If I had a Rocket Launcher (Telemarketing Version)"

Parody Written by:

John Harvey

The Lyrics

Here comes the telemark'ter, second time tonight
Try to eat my dinner, but I couldn't get a bite
How many times I tell them to go and take a hike
If I had a rocket launcher... I'd squash those parasites!

I don't want no insurance. I don't want a rebate.
I'm tired of your sales pitch, I want to clean my plate
I hang up on these b@st@rds from six o'clock to eight
If I had a rocket launcher... they would not call my place!

They talk about long distance, they ask about my kids
I pause and I wonder just who the hell this is
Cry out of frustration, my blood begins to fizz
If I had a rocket launcher... I would blow off some lids!

I'm getting calls from Sprint, and some from MCI
Every time I think about it, fire burns within my eyes
Now my dinner's stone, My burger and my fries
If I had a rocket launcher, they'd sure get some surprise!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   2
 5   9

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Peregrin - April 25, 2003 - Report this comment
Good work JH! And how very true, wish I'd thought of it!

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