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Song Parodies -> "The Baby Bites"
Original Song Title:
"You May be Right"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Billy Joel
Parody Song Title:
"The Baby Bites"
Parody Written by:
Rick Cormier
The Lyrics
Friday night, she started nursin'
Saturday, sex life's uncertain
Sunday came, my luck ran out again
I was hoping for some fun
She was hurting from my son
And so I employed the weak hand, for a change
We fought, she said, "Don't use that tone!"
I sat through CSI alone
And I told myself, "A cycle, pure and plain."
"Keep on hold, the old sex drive."
And "Try not to feel deprived."
But I wonder how much more I can restrain
The baby bites
The baby chews "em
Yeah, it just may be too soon to lick, they're looking sore
Hey, it ain't right
I wanna use "em
Don't know how long I'll have to go
"Cause the baby bites
For nine months, at TV, I've stared
Alone in my reclining chair
She'd said, "No dirty thoughts now, for a while."
Oh, but honey, I'm a man
And I've done the best I can
But the demon boy's starting to get me riled
Last night again, she let him suckle
Bit so hard, made her knees buckle
Kid could put a pit bull dog to shame
And he leaves her black and blue
It's a sin, what gums can do
Luckily, he has no teeth or, she'd be maimed
The baby bites
He ain't just grazin'
But a bottle may make junior sick, no formula
No teeth in sight
But that don't phase him
It's been so long, she just says no
"Cause the baby bites
The baby bites
The baby chews "em
Yeah, I've got to get some poon and quick, can't wait no more
Hey, it ain't right
Why does he bruise "em
Don't know how long I'll have to go
"Cause the baby bites
Leave "em alone "cause the baby bites
I can't get none "cause the baby bites
Leave "em alone "cause the baby bites
I can't get none "cause the baby bites
Saturday, sex life's uncertain
Sunday came, my luck ran out again
I was hoping for some fun
She was hurting from my son
And so I employed the weak hand, for a change
We fought, she said, "Don't use that tone!"
I sat through CSI alone
And I told myself, "A cycle, pure and plain."
"Keep on hold, the old sex drive."
And "Try not to feel deprived."
But I wonder how much more I can restrain
The baby bites
The baby chews "em
Yeah, it just may be too soon to lick, they're looking sore
Hey, it ain't right
I wanna use "em
Don't know how long I'll have to go
"Cause the baby bites
For nine months, at TV, I've stared
Alone in my reclining chair
She'd said, "No dirty thoughts now, for a while."
Oh, but honey, I'm a man
And I've done the best I can
But the demon boy's starting to get me riled
Last night again, she let him suckle
Bit so hard, made her knees buckle
Kid could put a pit bull dog to shame
And he leaves her black and blue
It's a sin, what gums can do
Luckily, he has no teeth or, she'd be maimed
The baby bites
He ain't just grazin'
But a bottle may make junior sick, no formula
No teeth in sight
But that don't phase him
It's been so long, she just says no
"Cause the baby bites
The baby bites
The baby chews "em
Yeah, I've got to get some poon and quick, can't wait no more
Hey, it ain't right
Why does he bruise "em
Don't know how long I'll have to go
"Cause the baby bites
Leave "em alone "cause the baby bites
I can't get none "cause the baby bites
Leave "em alone "cause the baby bites
I can't get none "cause the baby bites
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 35 | 35 | 35 |
User Comments
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WHOA! Nothing I could say could do this parody justice....it's PERFECT! I wrote in 10's
Yea...perfect! Love it, Rick, especially when you show such understanding. ;) 5's
Very funny and original.
Laughed so hard, the milk ran out my nose! 5s
Awww, what a cute little nipper!
Breast one I read today.
Hilarious, Rick. Super high 5's
uniquely original concept combined with some snazzy rhyming equals fives for your sublime parody
This was hilarious! "And so I employed the weak hand, for a change" -- classic.
You got some good licks in here...
Perfect pacing and good use of the original words. A masterpiece!
You milked this one for all it's worth.
Thanks everyone! This was one of those that sat unfinished for about 2 months. Then, this morning, it just finished itself.
This parody sucked - its way to all fives! You really nailed this one, which is nice considering it was the only thing getting nailed! Seriously, I can't say more than what's already been said, this one is great! 555
Good work.
Thank you, Stray Pooch and Tim.
Yep, this is a great one, Rick - one of your best, which is really saying something - I notice that you also like to work an OS line seamlessly into the stream "Alone in my reclining chair" - I love that! - 555
Thanks, Stuey Poo!
Rick, you might want to see this: http://amiright.com/parody/votingresults.shtml
Hey, thanks, Rick D! I didn't know Chucky kept track.
There used to be a link, but there was a problem with some people getting way more votes than seemed right, so Chucky hid it.
SOTM- 555....Good job, it had good rhyming too!
(SOTM) I was hoping you'd enter this one. Excellent, excellent work.
[SOTM] Brilliantly done. Superb parody 555
(SOTM) Already voted and commented. : ) 5's
[SOTM] DKTOS but a very interesting read nonetheless, 5s
(SOTM) Good work.
(SOTM) Oh wow! LOL. Loved the subtle Zappa reference. 555 fer you.
Thanks, Domenic, Jeff, DAK, Adagio, Abbott, and Scathe. Thanks Agri, didn't think anyone would catch that one. You're sharper than a poodle :-)
SOTM - I take it this is based on personal experiences and mammaries thereof? Great parody, "Kid could put a pit bull dog to shame" was my favorite line.
Thank you, Peter. No, the only thing I've personally experienced here is employing the weak hand. :-)
(SOTM) See above
(SOTM) I'll also say this is one of your breast works and that's saying a mouthful. Great work Rick.
Thank you, Johnny D and Red Ant
(SOTM) Biting humor
(SOTM) yep, still great - beautifully paced, and great syllable-matching and I loved "weak hand" for weekend - ha!
(SOTM) Wish I knew the original, your parody sounds even more superb than simply being a brilliant, funny read.
Bon appetit... or something like that ;-)
SOTM--Hi-freaking-larious, Rick...one of your best...=)
(SOTM) Very funny stuff :)
Nice, Nice Baby!!! 5's!!!
(ABC3-B) Luckily for you, Rick, unlike the last parody you entered in a contest that I'm also in, I could actualy understand what the hell you're talking about. A couple lines I didn't get, but I'm only 15, after all. Pacing was excellente! And, just as an aside, was the word 'poon' in the last chorus meant to be 'porn'?
No "poon" is what I meant. It is short for "poontang" which, in the US, is slang for the part of a woman's anatomy that enables them to accomplish such tasks as training a man to enjoy watching Oprah or, not to belch in public places.
(ABC3) Nice to see this one again...forgotten how much I liked it.
(ABC3B) See above, and I'd forgotten all the clever subs in this, particularly for "lunatic" in the last verse, hehe.
Excellent writing, here. You sure got your points across.
(ABC3-B) as I said above, one of your classic works, Rick - brilliant - did you record this one?
(ABC) What Johnny D said twice before!
"I sat through CSI alone" we've all been there ! (haven't we ?)
Loved it the first time, glad to have the chance to enjoy it again!
(ABC_B) Rick, straight up, you're a frikkin GENIUS writer! You make the mundane VERY funny. BRAVO! 555
I found this by clicking on the 'random' button. A masterpiece in hiding (from me apparently) :) That was brilliant Rick :)
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