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Song Parodies -> "Wells Fargo"

Original Song Title:

"Key Largo"

Original Performer:

Bertie Higgins

Parody Song Title:

"Wells Fargo"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

This parody is a fictional anecdote about someone down on their luck withdrawing money from a Wells Fargo Bank ATM, fantasizing about robbing the bank, then living high on the hog legally thanks to lottery games. *"Farley in his van": This refers to the famous "Saturday Night Live" skit in which the late Chris Farley remarks about living in a van down by the river, thus implying that the fictional, nameless person in this parody has an undesirable living situation, but is not homeless.
At the ATM booth
Runnin’ my card to get cash
That sweet green paper, so precious
Lying in my black billfold
Payin’ all o’ my bills
Payin’ my rent and utility
Cable and Internet
And almost zilch left over

I’ve got it bad
But not like Farley in his van*
Drivin’ in my old beat-up Yugo
To a bank called Wells Fargo

I’ve got money now
To pay for all that I owe on
I can get rich, oh, filthy rich, I know
But I won’t rob the Wells Fargo

I can truly remember
When I was very flush
That one day, ‘twas July 4th
I gambled me broke
I think I won’t
Gamble again
'Cause I’m flat broken, still
Baby, this might be the end

I’ve got it bad
(I’ve got it bad)
I’m livin’ in a ghetto ‘hood
My credit’s goin’ to bad from good
Thinkin’ ‘bout robbin’ Wells Fargo

I’m lookin’ at jail time
(In fed’ral prison)
If I up and rob the bank
I’ll be rich, I will, I know
And I won’t rob the Wells Fargo

I’ve got it all
(I’ve got it all)
Just like Mr. Donald Trump
‘Cause I played the Megabucks
And didn’t rob the Wells Fargo

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   10

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

AFW - May 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Very good..fine job of expressing mental jogging, and desperate self soul searching
Andria - May 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, AFW... did you work as a psychologist, mental-health specialist or psychiatrist prior to retirement? I'd like to know.
Timmy1000 - May 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Interesting thoughts and well written - I'll withdraw 5's for you on this one.
alvin - May 19, 2009 - Report this comment
unfamiliar with the OS but i knew i could "bank" on you for a fun read
AFW - May 19, 2009 - Report this comment
No, but thanks for the complimentary question...I worked doing Insurance adjusting, and inspecting..knock on door, house call stuff..then, typing up reports, etc.
2Eagle - May 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Why not try producing a Broadway flop - oops that was done before and it backfired.
Mark Scotti - May 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Ah, the days of the 'large withdrawal"! Great one, Andria, and good OS. I think someone else did a remake of it, but the name escapes me..
TJC - May 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Bailout blues on a personal level! Nice story teller'ing...
Andria - May 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks Timmy1K, thanks Alvin, this OS wasn't a huge hit to the best of my knowledge, thanks again AFW, your old job sounded both boring and interesting at the same time, thanks 2Eagle, thanks Mark, and thanks TJC.
Jim Rotondo - May 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Great story Andria, reminds me of the Twilight Zone with Dick York having the ability to hear co-workers at the bank think, one with a similar fantasy. Depositing $555 in your parody account.
Jason - May 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Great job! Ive been working a lot so haven't had much time to come on here. Don't worry I haven't forgotton about you. Great parody all the same. 555
Andria - May 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, Jim and Jason... I haven't forgotten about you either.
Abbott Skelding - November 11, 2010 - Report this comment
ABC (WX)- Never heard the OS, but this was still pretty good!
Mark Scotti - November 14, 2010 - Report this comment
(ABC) Not going to "widraw" my previous fives from this great one!
Below Average Dave - November 16, 2010 - Report this comment
Funny and relate-able at the moment, I have these kind of dreams all the time--being rich, not robbing Wells Fargo, great title too
Agrimorfee - November 24, 2010 - Report this comment
Guy - November 28, 2010 - Report this comment

Andria - Winnin' the megabucks is a far go from bank heist and federal time. I always liked the Fargo horsies. You horsed around with this little gem quite interestingly.

My "guyspeak" detector alerted on this line in the parody:

"I gambled me broke"

Clever bit of word-smithing. I also caught the "Flush" ref to gambling. Quite witty, indeed. Let me guess, you shot the moon on a flush and the house was full, maybe kings over deuces. =:-(

I know of only one situation where a flush beats a full house. This is a true experience. The Men's room at work has one urinal and two stalls and gets a line going sometimes. One of my co-workers was waiting anxiously cross-legged for his "shot" - too much coffee for him too quickly. What must have seemed an eternity to him until there was finally the sound of a flush. He let out a loud sigh and rapidly went for the available device that would bring him the much needed relief. During the wait you could feel the tension in the air and that is when I blurted out - "Hey, it's the only time a flush beats a full house". Everyone roared - it wasn't LOL it was ROL (Roar out loud).

One guy was sitting in one of the stalls and he laughed so hard that he produced about 10 seconds of nonstop flatulence, which only made everyone roar louder with laughter.

I vote a full house - three 5's and two jacks, just for jacking around.
bobpiecheese - November 28, 2010 - Report this comment
(ABC5) Well, to be honest, I don't know what to make of this one. Probably because I'm missing some key pieces of information due to either my age, my geographical location, my general lack of important knowledge or some sort of combination of all three. Not your fault, but I just couldn't get into it.

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