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Song Parodies -> "Shooting Tsars"

Original Song Title:

"Shooting Star"

Original Performer:

Bad Company

Parody Song Title:

"Shooting Tsars"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

A bit of early 20th-century history for you...
Lenin was a rebel
A revolutionary
Listened to Karl Marx
Left-wing Communist theory

Got himself a rifle
And prepared for a fight
When the people rise up
Everything's gonna be all right
Don't you know ...

Lenin said to Trotsky
"Hey Leon we're gonna win
But we gotta make sure
The Tsar don't come back agin"

Trotsky said "Kill them all?
Wipe out every one?"
Lenin said "Don't cry, Leon-
Just pick up the gun"

Don't you know
Don't you know
Don't you know that you've gotta shoot the Tsar
Don't you know
Don't you know that you've gotta shoot the Tsar
So we don't need to fear him
Coming back, from exile afar

In Ekaterinburg
Tsar Nicholas was shot
With his whole family, oh yeah
They shot the lot

Even little Anas-
Tasia was slain
Lenin said "Looks like
Disney got it wrong again.."

Don't you know
Don't you know
Don't you know if you go round shooting Tsars
Don't you know
Don't you know if you go round shooting Tsars
Then the whole world will fear you
Sayin' "Don't you shoot ours"

Lenin died one night
Died in his bed
"Watch out for Stalin"
Was the last thing he said

But Stalin grabbed power, so
Trotsky ran away
Killed by an ice-pick
In the heat of Mexico day

Don't you know,...
Don't you know
Don't you know if you go round shooting Tsars
Don't you know
Don't you know if you go round shooting Tsars
Then the whole world ain't safe
From a dictator, a despot like ours

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   11

User Comments

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Guy - December 17, 2003 - Report this comment
History is a subject not worth repeating. Boy, I miss the cold war. Nice job Phil.
Billy Florio - December 17, 2003 - Report this comment
Phil.......Im speechless.....
Jeff Reuben - December 17, 2003 - Report this comment
You learn something new everyday (or have disturbing flashbacks to a ninth grade European History class)
John Jenkins - December 17, 2003 - Report this comment
Very well done, Phil. I got a chuckle considering Lenin reviewing a Disney production. And I suspect you tried to work in the Trotsky/Frida Kahlo affair, but it did not quite fit.
Phil Alexander - December 18, 2003 - Report this comment
My kiddies have only recently got the Disney Anastasia, which is to history what Wild Bill Hickock was to animal rights... for a start, it makes her a dozen years too old just so they can get in the romance bit. I'm pleased someone commented on Lenin's Disney remark - it made me smile, thanks JJ. But no, I hadn't tried to work in Frida Kahlo, she'd have been way down the list, even if it was a friend of hers who assassinated Trotsky (while they were having an affair).

But I'm sorry if I gave anybody uncomfortable memories of history classes - writing this reminded me of mine, as it happens: I had a history teacher who was a great Lenin fan, but appalled by the way Lenin's dream was corrupted and distorted by Stalin - which has kind of coloured my view of history, too.
Michael Pacholek - December 19, 2003 - Report this comment
Historical parodies are always welcome. After all, as George Santayana said: "Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it." And Matt Kiene, a writer for "Gene Roddenberry's Andromeda," added, "Those who fail to learn it properly, why, they are simply doomed." And since you couldn't work in Kahlo, I guess Frida's just another word for nothing left to lose!
Guy - September 16, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC's) Oh I forgot to mention in my original comment that I loved your title. Great number for the contest.
Johnny D - September 22, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) Important history lesson cleverly presented.
Agrimorfee - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) Clever the verses build up to a laffable chorus punchline. Nice rip on Disney, but unfortunately the cartoon film was made by Don Bluth & Gary Goldman at 20th Century Fox. Sorry.
Phil Alexander - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
I suppose I could say "I knew it was 20th Century Fox, but that didn't scan"... but I didn't. "Anastasia" the video has been on at home once or twice (fortunately the children didn't take to it...), and I kind of assumed that anything that twists history that much just *has* to be Disney :-)
Adagio - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) DKTOS...clever title.
Phil Nelson - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) This was ok.
Melhi - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
S Round: I heard this song, the other day and thought, "Hmm, I might want to take a closer listen to this, soon, see if any parody ideas come to mind." But, this idea surpasses any I'd come up with. Nice job, Phil.
Peregrin - September 26, 2004 - Report this comment
Very good Phil, a contender!
Arwen - September 27, 2004 - Report this comment
ABCs...I really wish I knew the original...hmph!
Meriadoc - September 28, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) Good one Phil! But you know, if you'd spelled it czars, you coulda got a whole lot more points in scrabble.... ;-)
Phil Alexander - September 28, 2004 - Report this comment
Maybe I just didn't have the letters, Merry :-) But I've got a scrabble parody round here somewhere... just needs finishing off.
Jeff Reuben - September 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Excellent job Phil. Definitely in my top 5
Martha - October 02, 2004 - Report this comment
Just loved the title and the concept ... hilarious!

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