Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "Black Coffee"

Original Song Title:

"Black Velvet"

Original Performer:

Alannah Myles

Parody Song Title:

"Black Coffee"

Parody Written by:

Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd

The Lyrics

A YouTube version of the original song can currently be found here.
Frappuccino cannot get me up a stairwell
Irish Coffee can't fuel me a night
My barista as of lately needs more cowbell
I'm done with cream, I want a glass with Fahrenheights

To make me blink
A cup with no-colouring
And to underscore
To get me off the floor

Black coffee from a kettle that bites
Black coffee you can smell from a mile
A cup of java that will straighten out my knees
Black coffee if you please

After breakfast, my coffee needs a heatwave
After dinner, strength to kill a child
My barista's promised coming to my black grave
Percolated brought to pour and I'm revived

I cannot move
On watered thin, my cuppa joe
And Latte furthermore
Can't get me out the door

Black coffee for my mettle to ride
Black coffee with a nada on side
A cup of straight black with no fancy artwork fees
Black coffee if you please

Every pop in every drop in a black cuppa joe
In a flash turns you on, up cracking like new
So order two

Black coffee from a kettle that steams
Black coffee with a nada of cream
A cup of java with no soy or molten cheese
Black coffee's the bee's knees

Black coffee for my fettle to ride
Black coffee is the tool I apply
Three cups of java is my morning ABCs
Black coffee, make it three

Make it three
Make it three
If you please

© Peter Andersson.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.

Voting Results

Pacing: 4.2
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   4

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Peter Andersson - August 09, 2017 - Report this comment
Thanks for the votes!

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 918