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Song Parodies -> "The Geeks of the Orpheum"

Original Song Title:

"The Gates of Delirium"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"The Geeks of the Orpheum"

Parody Written by:

Porfle Popnecker

The Lyrics

Stand in line, we do consider
Refunding of the tickets held between us
To see other show
The line there
In motion
To "Barney's Great Adventure"

Scan the posters, scoring tickets
Leap in line to "Barney's Great Adventure"
Boring, we know
But boy, we're missing
The joint's full reaction
As snack bar lures to us
Lips smacking, ah

Choose 16-ounce, soda foams with the flow
Fill or be spilling, sticky soles connect the floor
Casting melted butter in vast penetrating glow
To offer butt'ry popcorn sheen
As trailers span the seconds left till Barney's on the screen

Brats that bounce and scream in tantrums
Parents left passing, bestowed a double feature
Swiftly they blow
They rush to Starbuck's
Latte' and wheat bun
Away they scatter

Two seats together, ignoring it's "gay"
Vile acts befall us, this rowdy display
Kick our seats, with popcorn show'red
And lukewarm grape-ade spray
Their god appears to wild applause
To smile and sing and dance and tell a story with his paws

"Wishing, we were friends forever
Knowing that I love you, girls and boys
Wishing, makes us magic children
Wishing, you could know how much I
Love you now!"

Wishing, this film would be broken
And Barney we were chokin', till he croaks
Chills us, zombie-like the children
Wills them, kill us he could tell them
And they will

The toys will sell, cast "I want it" spell
The dino-shill in giddy tones
Will lead them all to hell
Our buzz he kills, our drinks we spill, and dashing we are gone
And time won't still the screaming things
Devour'd in bunches, prey for evil purple vermin

[long instrumental passage]

Goon, a goon the child
That by giant purple prune beguiled
Gone brainless for a
Big sleazy dino-bore

Goon, a goon the tyke
To be moved by such inhuman psych
With wallets open
Big easy dino-whore

What a show, sales pitch in rhyme

Goons, foresee the sight
Barney raped in prison
What delight
His buns will feed us
Well-seasoned dinosaur

Goons, foresee his flight
As a moving target
In our sights
Our guns will free us
In season, dinosaur

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   1
 3   0
 4   0
 5   7

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Rob Arndt - June 11, 2012 - Report this comment
I good swipe at a show I hated. I don't know why kids get into all this crazy stuff. Barney to me was a Flopasaur while the Teletubbies were just freakish and gay. Today, I can't stand my niece's show "Yo Gabba Gabba"!
Porfle Popnecker - June 11, 2012 - Report this comment
I'm usually pretty tolerant of kids' shows, but I hate seeing Barney dancing around saying "I love you" just to sell toys. Mr. Rogers, on the other hand, sincerely cared about helping kids--in fact, he considered it his calling from God. And he didn't use his show to push "Mr. Rogers" merchandise.
Rob Arndt - June 11, 2012 - Report this comment
I think Bill Cosby ripped-off Fred Rogers with the sweater routine and morality lessons! But Mr. Rogers was cool for the time and so was claymation "Davey and Goliath"... which along with stop-motion animation has been ripped-off by "Robot Chicken".
Andria - June 11, 2012 - Report this comment
Good work here, Porfle. I loved Mr. Rogers, Captain Kangaroo, Sesame Street, Shari Lewis, Zoom, early Nickelodeon stuff and the Electric Company as a little girl, that was all quality kids' programming. Barney sucks, Sesame Street jumped the shark when Elmo's World came in, and kids' TV has been heavily commercialized since before I graduated high school. The most recent shows I have ever liked are "Zoboomafoo", "Hey Arnold", "Doug" and "Rugrats". 5s.
Porfle Popnecker - June 12, 2012 - Report this comment
Rob--I was a big "Davey & Goliath" fan and still am. I've found some good episodes on DVD. Strangely enough, Hal "Otis Campbell" Smith did most of the adult male voices on that show. Later got into "Gumby", too, also done by animator Art Clokey. Andria--thanks! I watched most of those shows myself except for the more recent Nickelodeon ones. Captain Kangaroo and Shari Lewis were a big part of my childhood.

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