{Intro riff played on ballpark organ}

It seems you grounded out
Fans in the stands just scream and shout
At your hitting display
One more inning ending double play just
Add it to your tally

You have a feeble swing
You cannot hit a freakin' thing
The pitchers throw your way
Is it any wonder that the locals
Have nicknamed you Sally?

Out in the outfield seats
I feel the breeze when you whiff on a curve ball
One more strikeout we will swear and loudly boo
Ten mil contract keeps you here and in our crew
Twenty four at bats without a hit, do you have a clue?

Can’t we get rid of you?
You’re no George Brett, or Matt Alou
Deserve a big Bronx cheer
For the piddly dribbler you just hit to
First that killed our rally

Is it too much to ask
You hit a gork, a big fly, or a weak flare?
One more strikeout we will swear and loudly boo
Ten mil contract keeps you here and in our crew
Twenty four at bats without a hit, do you have a clue?


The catcher gives the sign, three fingers pointed down with his hand
The pitcher hurls the ball - a slider - seems he has good command
It breaks across the plate, swing and a miss, again you have fanned

The closer rubs his hands, the crowd noise drifts on down from the stands
It is the ninth inning, the bases loaded, it’s not as planned
But he no longer fears because you can’t hit it out of here


Another ground ball out
Can’t we expect a decent clout?
Another ground ball out
Can’t we expect a decent clout?

{repeat ballpark organ riff from intro}

You give me a headache
Rather replace you with Eddie Mendoza
Hitting .204, you suck, do you care?

{Steve Howe and Rick Wakeman perform Take Me Out to the Ballgame}

Again you grounded out
Eleven games; your batting drought
I turn away and pray
When the season ends you’ll hang ‘em up, be
Your career finale

You’ll never catch a break
Your grounders do not have eyes, always get snared.
One more strikeout we will swear and loudly boo
Ten mil contract keeps you here and in our crew
Twenty four at bats without a hit, do you have a clue?

{ends with the fans chanting DAH-da-da-da-DAH-da-da-da-DAH
DAH-da-da-DAH-da-DAAAH!, Charge!}