I met her at the lanes at the midnight bowl
Where they dim the lights and they eat hot dogs
And they bowl-a B-B-B-B-bowl-a
She walked up the lane in her sexy short pants
She already had me in a tenpin trance - she's a
Bowler, B-B-B-B-bowler, B-B-B-B-bowler

Well I'm not the world's most flappable guy
But when she shined my ball I nearly touched the sky
Oh my bowler, B-B-B-B-bowler
Now I'm not dumb so I gave her a grin
Thinking that bowler woman sure could set my pins
Oh my Bowler, B-B-B-B-bowler, B-B-B-B-bowler

Well, we quaffed some beer and bowled all night
Then she did see the strangest sight
Released my Angle, perfectly you see
"How'd I hit the pocket but still leave the three?"
Well I felt anger rising up my spine
And then I stamped the foul line, and desp'rately tried to
Ca-jole-a, that three pin to fall-a - Oh oh what a bowler
Bowler, B-B-B-B-bowler, B-B-B-B-bowler

I pushed it away
I released that ball
I gave it my all
It ignored all my pleas...
Then I grinned at her and she at me

Well that's the way that the game it is played
And maybe in time I will get to play with my Bowler, B-B-B-B-bowler
Spares will be strikes and strikes will be spares
It's a mixed up muddled up Alley affair except my Bowler, B-B-B-B bowler

Well that bowler how I did adore
And I'd never ever bowled 300 before
But Bowler smiled and told me "If you care
Love's a 7-10 split - won't you pick up my spare?"

Well I'm not afraid of difficult tasks
But I know what that is and it's a hell of an ask
But so is Bowler
B-B-B-B-bowler, B-B-B-B-bowler
Bowler, B-B-B-B-bowler, B-B-B-B-bowler