Late last night I saw a clown drown
Swimming for the other side
Getting in Loch Ness is bad man
Stay on terra firma dry

Big scary monster, many have tried
Fooling people, she will do you wrong
If you can haul 'er up you'll be a man
But my boy you should be awfully strong

"You'll make it back alive if you poke out her eyes"
Boomed a voice that matched to his size
He was a strong fool woodman on a mad quest
I think he said his name was Paul
Gonna be trouble in the Loch Ness
'Cause that strong fool woodman came to brawl

Wooo!

I thought that they both were a fable
Then I saw Nessie make that splash
And Bunyan's feet as big as this table, boy
And he's hellbent him and Nessie will clash
Said she's calling to him like a siren
And the big guy like to have his fun
Looked to me a bit unstable
Dives in lake like he's been shot from a gun

Well the big guy was jumping on Nessie
They began to have a fight
She said, "Didn't know you cared
'Bout my Nessie Loch lair
Well I'm hot to be for givin'
If you wanna do some kissin'
Love a strong cool woodman in my Loch Ness!"
Think she found her beau, name of Paul
With just one look she was in love, yes
'Cause that long tool woodman had it all

Had it all, had a brawl, has a maul
He's so tall, name is Paul, had a ball
Ooooo, had a ball......