Song Parodies -> "Asparagus Woman"

Original Song Title:

"American Woman"

^(MP3)

Original Performer:

"Asparagus Woman"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

asparagus woman...stays away from peas
asparagus woman...don't want lima beans
she keeps bringin' it from the store
i don't wanna see this stuff no more
i got more important things to chew
this daily grind, gettin' old, its true
now, woman...take my plate away
asparagus woman...take it off my tray

asparagus woman...get some corn for me
asparagus woman...even hominy
the green stalks, i've come to abhor
don't wanna taste their flavor no more
could be have some cottage fries ?
dark green things i now despise
now, woman...take this crap away
asparagus woman...i won't eat today

asparagus woman..i just can't stay
asparagus woman...rather eat some hay
i'll just throw it upon the floor
don't wanna feed my face no more
i would like some navy beans
i could dig some collard greens
feel my stomach start to rise
what she serves is no surprise
now, woman...can't you see i'm peeved
asparagus woman...i just can't believe

yo...gonna say my say...gonna have my say
no more...no more
gonna leave 'em, woman...gonna leave 'em, woman
want fries...want fries...want fries...want fries
they're no good to me...i'm fed up with you
gonna toss these things up to the sky
tell ya, i just wanna spew
you know i'm gonna heave...you know i'm gonna blow
you know i'm gonna heave...you know i'm gonna blow, woman
don't buy asparagus, woman
don't buy asparagus, chick
don't buy asparagus, broad

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Johnny D - December 05, 2004 - Report this comment

Mmm, love asparagus...5's

Meriadoc - December 05, 2004 - Report this comment

Hate asperagus - loved the parody! Alvin, why don't you come over the the MB and enter my Corne contest? :-)

Paul Robinson - December 05, 2004 - Report this comment

Great job, alvin...5's ~ ~ ~ but it's still not the grossest "American Woman" parody...sorry, won't plug it here...if you're interested you have to look it up...however, puking IS a common point between them...

M. McCain - December 05, 2004 - Report this comment

Nice job, Alvin. Your subject is ironic because I made asparagus casserole today for the first time.:-( Think I'll stick with squash. 5-5-5 :-)

Tim Mayfield - December 05, 2004 - Report this comment

My wife said to give you three 5's for this one. I shall comply this time. :-)

alvin rhodes - December 06, 2004 - Report this comment

thanks johnny merry paul mccain and tim (and wife).....merry, i'll see what i can come up with

AFW - December 06, 2004 - Report this comment

I love food parodies...and this is a great...5's

Stuart McArthur - December 06, 2004 - Report this comment

gee, only today I was thinking of parodying this OS - great lines, but a special mention to the simplest one: "want fries...want fries...want fries...want fries" - 555

alvin rhodes - December 06, 2004 - Report this comment

thanks AFW and stuart

Serafina - December 06, 2004 - Report this comment

I love asparagus too...5-5-5. :)

alvin rhodes - December 07, 2004 - Report this comment

thanks serafina....i like peas, green beans and corn...i leave the rest of the vegetable kingdom alone

Michael Pacholek - December 07, 2004 - Report this comment

You had me from the title! And while your asparagus might be steamed, your parody lost no steam!

Arwen - June 17, 2005 - Report this comment

Alvin, I don't know where I was when this originally posted...but it is FAB-U-LOUS!! Great job! And, for the record, I totally love asparagus...hehehe.

Leo Jay - June 17, 2005 - Report this comment

Great.

Agrimorfee - June 17, 2005 - Report this comment

The problem with asparagus is it makes yer pee stink real bad later that night. Great fooling' with the ad lib fadeout! 555

Danny Orr - August 21, 2005 - Report this comment

You making any money from this thing Alvin?

white trash - July 20, 2008 - Report this comment

well at least shes not a dairy queen woman i loved it 555

LittleCupCakes - July 21, 2008 - Report this comment

Sir Avin, ~Lord o'BedRock~, ~ Duke o' Swervin' Roads ~ This is truly AWESOME ! I love it, and it matches the ~OS~ quite superbly, Sir! I Love it ! (( x ))

alvin - July 21, 2008 - Report this comment

thanks michael, arwen, leo, agri, danny..nope...white trash and LittleCupCakes

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