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Song Parodies -> "Hypochrondo"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

The Beach Boys

Parody Song Title:


Parody Written by:

Guy DiRito

The Lyrics

Pneumonia, Glaucoma, I just know they'll get ya,
Lymphoma, in coma, "germs from Oklahoma,"
Lumbago, contage-o,
I don't want it, hell no.
I'm hypo-chrond-rio.

Hey now what's that sneeze?
Was that a sign of vertigo?
I need to find my Intern-o,
To give me tests wall to wall.
Needles in my hand,
Tropical links forming in my gland,
To late for crime scene gloves,
The pathogen now does so expand,
I'm Hypo-chron-der-an!

Purge a week, why don't it make me sleek?

Diet food from sea,
No doubt mess our chemestry.
All this food makes me high,
Got to go fill this cavity,
With crab-cake delight.
All food we eat in sight,
That seafood diet we set,
All the food that we see we et.
That's why we're hydro-chrond-ret.

Port wine Cheese,
Oh give it to me please.
Neuritis, neuralgia, can make you feel nostalgia.
When doctor's would heal ya, way before they'd kill ya.
Ebola and Dengue, sounds like sick Ferengi,
Might get comatose, eating up some dish of old French toast.
Make you hypo-chrond-ous.

Ohh, they thinks I fakes my hy-po-chond-ri-aches.

Everybody knows a little bit 'bout hy-chrond-ro,
Now if you wanna go and fake a trip to sick call,
Just act Hypo-chond-ro.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 21

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   3
 2   0
 3   0
 4   3
 5   15

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Johnny D - September 26, 2007 - Report this comment
"Ebola and Dengue, sounds like sick Ferengi" -- LOL! Our Guy is back & better than ever! 555!
Adagio - September 26, 2007 - Report this comment
Words unspoken.
Poop Pants - September 26, 2007 - Report this comment
Nice parody of a great 80s comeback song, Mr. Guy!! 555's for you
alvin - September 26, 2007 - Report this comment
i'm sick with laughter...i think anyway
Tommy Turtle - September 26, 2007 - Report this comment
Good sendup of inane OS... Hey! What's wrong with diet food from the sea? 555
John Barry - September 26, 2007 - Report this comment
Hilarious litany of illness.
Kristof Robertson - September 26, 2007 - Report this comment
Welcome back, Guy! The dengue/Ferengi rhyme was brilliantly leftfield. Great stuff. 555
Guy - September 26, 2007 - Report this comment
Mr. Turtle - You and all the others have been most kind dispite my lame lyrics with your votes and comments, but I've been out of the mold for over two years. You just don't come bouncing back, but I had a very pleasant surprise from all my old friends and I was humbled to find that some new comers have read and like what I've written before just a few days ago. I am considered very controversial, to say the least, on this site but it's nice to see that you all remember me even though I have been known to speak my mind especially when it wasn't P.C. or more like Pee-sy, and to do so and use my own name doing it. To get back on point TT about your questioin, it was a lame attempt to state "being on a sea food diet" with the roll out of "I see food and I eat it". Anyone from Bulgaria? I bet they get it there? Go figure. And TT and anyone else, please use my ideas and whatever you want on this site that I have penned. I don't hiss up a rope when someone uses my stuff. So TT, please don't use it anywhere else but this site without express permission from me or my caretake who has power of attorney. You need this sort of thing when you reach my age. I'm getting way too old for this. It's like Cholestrol - I drive way to fast to worry about that. Really I'm waiting for some commercial on TV to use my lyrics so I can retire in style. And to all whom has bid me welcome back, I'd tip my hat if I wore one but I swore off of them when I left the military. I don't think I'm going to be quite so prolific with my writings but I will pop in from week to week., I think. Thanks again to one and all, it was a most pleasant surprise. (I'll give you two weeks and you'll be at my throat again. :)
MrMacphisto - September 26, 2007 - Report this comment
The laughter this induces is very contagious... 5-5-5
Tommy Turtle - September 26, 2007 - Report this comment
Guy, I do know the joke of "see food" diet. The remark was a lame joke on my own nick -- turtles eat seaweed etc.... I make such lame self-referential cracks all the time, as those here know.

I haven't used any of your stuff, and wouldn't without permission. I wouldn't want mine used either . But I've referred to your work and put links to it. See: where "Wasting Away Again In Tommyturtleville" cites your song, "Guy DiRito-ville" in the intro, and has a hyperlink to it in the song body.

Poop on PC. Lots of us here like controversy and speaking one's mind, self included. Speaking of which, it's "hypochondriac", not "hypochRondriac" :-) Cheers, TT.
Ann Hammond - September 26, 2007 - Report this comment
I sang.
Guy - September 26, 2007 - Report this comment
Ann - I'd love to hear this sung, 'Cept I sound like a ship blowing its foghorn being pulled along by stoned cats in heat on steroids. Thanks for singing it - Would have loved to hear it.
Andria - September 26, 2007 - Report this comment
Tommy, you're right. It's "Hypochondro", not "Hypochrondo". I have a history of being somewhat of a hypochondriac, albeit only to get free Vicodin. (I only succeeded once). 555
Phil Alexander - October 06, 2007 - Report this comment
Hi, Guy - long time no see :-)
I thought "fakes my hypochondri-aches" was brilliant... Does this mean we'll be seeing a load more DiRito offerings coming up?

PS Security code: 89D... now *that*'s big
Agrimorfee - November 29, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4) Hyplearious.
Matthias - November 29, 2007 - Report this comment
I love the lyrics, I think they're freaking hilarious, but I have to say that I got lost reading this.... I think you missed some lines of a stanza or something.... Great idea, great lines, but there was something about the song that didn't pace correctly to this.
Guy - November 29, 2007 - Report this comment

Thanks Agri

Matthias - It is quite possible that I may have missed something. This was the first parody I had written in about 2 1/2 years, I did listen to the OS on youtube several times and then again several times after it was written. I didn't recall missing anything. Perhaps give a youtube listen and see if I missed missing something. Thanks.
Red Ant - December 08, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4-H) Yeah, I got thrown a bit reading this as well. The first chorus is different from the rest of them, and the second and last two choruses are missing. But, still a great effort after such a long absence and on a difficult OS. 455
bobpiecheese - December 08, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4H) And I thought I was the only one to write a hypochondriatic parody. Oh well, live and learn. Well done Guy!
Mikey Squirrel - December 11, 2007 - Report this comment
ABC- I think you missed the first chorus, Guy. (Right before the "Purge a week" line) But that's OK, you can just repeat the first lines and it still works. Or maybe I'm just coming down with something. Yea, that's it. Very funnyand well done, Guy.
stuart mcarthur - December 12, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4) so this marked your comeback Guy - and what a way to come back - great wordplay, none better than "hy-po-chond-ri-aches" - 555
Kristof Robertson - December 12, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4H) Although you kind of dropped the bal with the first line rhyme, Guy (Glaucoma/get ya) I'll forgive you coz this was a riot of silly words and tongue-in-cheekery.
Below Average Dave ( - December 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Originality (A) I have to be honest Guy, prior to this parody, I wasn't a fan. . .but this parody was just too original and creative not to laugh. Pacing (B) Well, not so much pacing as much as formatting, I got lost when the choruses came up because it didn't say anything in your lyrics about them coming up, but aside from that, good pacing; Comedy (A) You had me cracking up, and in this case a repetitive chorus worked; The X Factor (A) You gained a fan with THIS song, there are many songs in your collection that I differed in opinion on--but this parody was amazing, and I can't honestly vote this out the top 5--congratulations on this write.
Guy - December 15, 2007 - Report this comment
Thank you all for reviewing this on an ABC comp. Methinks you all were overkind to me with your comments and voting on the contest thread. This thing could have been done by me much better.

BADave - you floored me with your comment. It is rare indeed to receive such a 2 thumbs up critique. I was pleasantly surprised by it. I appreciate your constuctive critisism. Even an oldtimer can use constructive critisism. Perfection is something we strive to achieve but impossible to obtain. Our best hope is to do the best we can to get as close to perfect as humanly possible. Thank-you so much friend. And my congrats to the medalists and winners.

One question for anyone out there. Can anyone explain to me what dsxfhlon and artistry comps are about? I could search the threads on the boards but my patoence in such matters wanes at home since I am forced to do a lot of this at work researching communications and network anomalies online for abound 35 percent of the day and I'm weiry of it when I get home. Thanks.
Guy - December 15, 2007 - Report this comment
Whoops - My bad. dsxfhlon shoud be decathlon and patoence shoud be patience.
Red Ant - December 15, 2007 - Report this comment
Hey Guy, the Decathlon is a 10 round contest featuring randomly drawn topics that you have to parody. It is closed though until (if) the next Decathlon starts. Artistry competition is on a two week timetable and is based on an artist. The current Artist is the Moody Blues:

Even though this competition is in its 17th round, it's got another 123 to go: IOW, 4 more years. The artists were picked at the inception of the contest and vary from the popular and classic ones to the completely obscure.
littleCupCakes - December 15, 2007 - Report this comment
Here's a little sip of cherry for you sir, to help with your weariness!

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