(Instrumental Lead-in)

When your system is slow runnin',
And your LAN is actin' odder.
It runs tired like it's done in,
And your cache says out of order.
There may have been virus slingin',
When you drag it does delete.
Like a Wang LAN it goes hangin',
As your system over heats.

Is your MAC whacked? screwed up again,
Keeps loopin' round and round,
Are you hacked, Jack? boot it again.

Status shows a usage climber,
Wish your PC you could mend.
"Out of room" comes a reminder,
And there's sure no room to lend.
Then it goes and recompiles one,
System date shows it's tomorrow,
Then maligns your system filin',
It's now seized the space it borrowed.

Not a Mac, Jack, doin' you in,
Drives turnin' I-O bound.
You're hi-jacked, cracked, boot it again.

(Instrumental Interlude)

Your soft-ware on disk is bogus,
And you see a scramblin' LAN.
Misaligned; it's hocus pocus,
And your scanner will not scan,
Your LAN card is actin' funny,
And your hard drive's write disabled.
This will milk you for some money,
Cause it fried your look-up table.

Yeah. You got a hacked stack, do you on in,
You’re burnin' down, man, down.
You've been hacked jack, done in again.