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Song Parodies -> "Officially Dickless"

Original Song Title:

"Merry Christmas Everybody"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Officially Dickless"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

Are you giving up before you even start?
Does the slightest setback cause you to lose heart
You dilly and you dally
You flip and then you flop
And anything you pick up, soon you'll drop

'Cause you're officially dickless
Everybody thinks you're dumb
Spineless and witless
With less backbone than a sponge

Are you waiting till you finally grow a spine?
Do you cover up your cowardice with lyin'?
As you spin the same ol' rubbish: your cojones are the best
Yet you turn and run at the simplest test

'Cause you're officially dickless
Everybody's thinks you're scum
Whining and gutless
All the nerve of a blancmange

What will your daddy do
When he sees you're still writing to Santa Claus?
Ah ah

Are you giving up before you even start?
Are you acting like a scaredy silly tart?
Do you run away from danger, when danger don't exist
So scared of girls, you've never yet been kissed

Chorus (4x)

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   2

User Comments

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RichG - December 30, 2011 - Report this comment
Spine / lyin' ??? Must have needed a strong coffee when you got to that rhyme. The rest is pretty good, though.
Phil Alexander - December 30, 2011 - Report this comment
:-) "Dumb/Sponge" and "Scum/blancmange" aren't exactly perfect rhymes either.. but I've done this one at an open mic, and the rhymes kind of work.

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