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Song Parodies -> "The Scanning Man"
Original Song Title:
"The Candy Man"
Original Performer:
Sammy Davis Jr.
Parody Song Title:
"The Scanning Man"
Parody Written by:
Airfarcewon
The Lyrics
Who can view your undies
Ragged as they are
Treat you like Al Bundy's
Classic famous nudie bar?
The scanning man,
Oh, the scanning man can,
The scanning man can,
Cuz he ex-rays your whole bod
The way a doctor would..
Who finds all your tattoos,
Though you've hidden some,
And plain as public statues,
Hairy moles upon your bum?
The scanning man,
Oh, the scanning man can
The scanning man can,
Cuz' he owns the right to prod,
Examine you real good..
When you choose to fly,
Privacy, goodbye..
TSA controls the nation
Pumps you full of radiation
Boarding airplanes...the occasion
If times you feel coquettish,
Male with under-silk,
Who's bound to know your fetish
Every secret, every ilk?
The scanning man,
Oh, the scanning man can
The scanning man can,
Cuz' he has the high up nod
To check your privates good
Ragged as they are
Treat you like Al Bundy's
Classic famous nudie bar?
The scanning man,
Oh, the scanning man can,
The scanning man can,
Cuz he ex-rays your whole bod
The way a doctor would..
Who finds all your tattoos,
Though you've hidden some,
And plain as public statues,
Hairy moles upon your bum?
The scanning man,
Oh, the scanning man can
The scanning man can,
Cuz' he owns the right to prod,
Examine you real good..
When you choose to fly,
Privacy, goodbye..
TSA controls the nation
Pumps you full of radiation
Boarding airplanes...the occasion
If times you feel coquettish,
Male with under-silk,
Who's bound to know your fetish
Every secret, every ilk?
The scanning man,
Oh, the scanning man can
The scanning man can,
Cuz' he has the high up nod
To check your privates good
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 10 | 9 | 9 |
User Comments
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Truly funny. A classic. A Professor Incubus offered the other day to record my "Mr TSA Man". If he sees this one, maybe he'll be inspired to produce a whole album of TSA songs. I like your reference to Al Bundy's nudie bar, and "when you choose to fly, privacy goodbye". One of the best songs on this subject so far.
Another great one, Airfarce. Liked the "And plain as public statues, Hairy moles upon your bum", lol.
I echo Patrick, and also liked "high up nod". I think the best version was sung by Gene Wilder as owner of The Chocolate Factory. 555
@ Patrick: I'll view your song, and hope you didn't overlook my "Next!" last week and "Homeland Security" today on this topic.
@ Patrick: I'll view your song, and hope you didn't overlook my "Next!" last week and "Homeland Security" today on this topic.
The TSA are only following a logical path of evolution methinks, as more and more Americans go from size XL to XXXL in clothes it's only to be exspected that airport scanning technology goes from X-ray to XXX-ray...
Sir L'AIR de Farce . . . Don't SCAN me, Bro ! !
Well, I guess that means he can see the three 5's I've got in my envelope to give to you... LOL! ;-D
My fave of all the TSA parodies to date.
Thanks, everyone for votes and nice comments
The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.
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