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Song Parodies -> "Defense Of Dark Arts"

Original Song Title:

"War Is A Science"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Defense Of Dark Arts"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

I got the idea of doing Broadway hits about Harry Potter from Agrimorfee. So thanks Aggy. If you don't know the OS:
“Students please be seated!”

(Lupin: sung)
Defense of Dark Arts
In here I’ll be your guide
Be good students and concentrate
Raise your hand, Participate
No spell to help you procreate
I have tried

(Lupin: spoken)
Now Slytherians
Please pay attention
This is how to disarm a bogart

(Lupin: sung)
To blow apart a bad bogart I’ll take you though this drill
They visualize your worst scare, and do trust me they will
Destroy them by laughing

“Response I’ll be graphing”

There is no need for ruckus, just yell out “RIDDIKULUS!"
Then finally the bogart will have no choice but depart
And thus using this spell will bid the beast adieu

So then who’s up first? Hermonie!
Come pull your wand. Know what to say?
Though you look weak and scrawny
You are sure to get an A

(Lupin reaches for the closet door)

Say when!
Say when!
When you’re prepared…
Say when!

(Hermonie: Sung)
And then Lupin opens doors, and I’m afraid
I see all final tests I bombed, just like a grenade
“Eeek!” I yell and swear and drop my jaw
“RIDDIKULUS!” That ends all of my stress

(Lupin: Spoken)
Congrats! House Points to Griffindor!!!

Who’s up next?
Ah yes…

(Lupin: Sung)
Come up here Weasley
And promise to be brave
Though you might see your sister’s grave
Or you as Draco Malfoy’s slave
You know it’s fake. So grin’s not fading
Don’t disdain

(Ron: Sung)
Now then professor opens up the doors so suddenly
A mass amount of hairy spiders all crawl surrounding me
I want to stomp them all to kill
And Lupin then recaps
“Just pull your wand and think funny cause this is all a trap”
Then I shout out “RIDDIKULUS!” with humor in my mind
And thankfully the scene does change. I fall on my behind

(Lupin: Sung)
I am overjoyed to tell you Ron
You’re an asset to this class
A plus, my boy you’ve earned from me
There is nothing further to discuss

Who’s next?
Who’s next?
No volunteers?
Who’s next?

(Draco: Sung)
I’m so annoyed by all of these losers getting A’s
If they can do it easily I’m sure I shall amaze!
I’m beyond these foolish geeks by years
“RIDDIKULUS!” I shall get instant success

(Lupin: Yelling)
“Come up here and show us then!”

(Draco: Spoken)
“Not a problem professor”

(Draco: Sung)
Now you’d better watch me closely
You’ll be sure to give me thanks
Cause what separates a Slytherian from all the other ranks?
We rule! On our side’s Snape, Voldemort, and Death Eaters
I’ll show you up cause unlike you guys we are not cheaters
I’m now done with my rant. Lupin open doors and start
Oh this is really scary, I shall make him blow apart!

(Lupin opens the doors)

Got an F in your class Severus?
In the Peace Corp is my father?
Turns out Voldemort’s a great big wuss?
“RIDDIKULUS!” I just holler

That’s tough…

(Lupin: Spoken)
Good job

Great work students! Good job!

Done… We’re are now done

Good work students you did very fine today!
Taking on some creepy thing and blowing it away!
A bogart is the one thing we all fear
Say the line and grin from ear to…

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   5

User Comments

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Matthias - September 27, 2007 - Report this comment
I messed up the grammer a little bit in this. It should have been "Defense FROM Dark Arts", not "Of Dark Arts", but everything else in this parody was right.
Matthias - September 27, 2007 - Report this comment
Apparently nobody is familer with the musical "Pippin", no worries... I'm not either.
Red Ant - September 27, 2007 - Report this comment
I played the video - very good OS and great parody despite most of the references went over my head. "Don't disdain" seemed a bit awkward - maybe Tommy Turtle can explain why...
Kristof Robertson - September 27, 2007 - Report this comment
Didn'tKTOS, Matty....but what an enormous effort you've put in here. Very clever. 555
MrMacphisto - September 27, 2007 - Report this comment
DKTOS... but here are some 5's for effort.

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