Mom:

Shopping sprees around the nation.
Glee is shown around the mall.
Not the mirth from shoppers bringing gloom.
Leeches leave that cash alone.
Hey! Leeches! Let them buy alone!
All in all it's just reasons to charge in the mall.
All in all just more reasons to charge at the mall.

We need rest from all temptation.
All that shopping takes a toll.
They're pressing from all sides for us to consume.
Moochers leave us all alone.
Hey! Lady! Sign here for a loan!
All in all we're just shoppers shuffling in the hall.
All in all you're just shoppers shuffling in the hall.

(shouting ....)
Wrong, we don't take checks!
If you don't shop for everyone else and get them a little
something, how can you expect something in return?
You! Yes, lady behind the counters, sign here NOW!


Dad:

Shopping brings me much frustration.
Be that guy from the north pole.
Getting spasms from exhaust fumes,
Reachin' this mall's loading zone.
Try reachin' this mall's loading zone!
It's only fall and al-ready sick of this mall.
Wall to wall another Christmas at the Mall.

Christmas shoppers on vacation,
Shopping for some rock and roll.
And please don't ask 'em where's the restroom,
Locale still is quite unknown.
It's only fall and al-ready sick of this mall.
Wall to wall another Christmas at the Mall.

Spoken:

Wrong turn again!
If I can't find the restroom, my back teeth will be floating. And if my back teeth start to floating I may not need the restroom.
There! yes over there behind that construction, what's that sign say? Restroom closed, under construction???