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Song Parodies -> "Fifty Ways To Be a 'Brotha'"
Original Song Title:
"Fifty Ways To Leave Your Lover"
Original Performer:
Paul Simon
Parody Song Title:
"Fifty Ways To Be a 'Brotha'"
Parody Written by:
Leo Jay
The Lyrics
For Tiger...
I got a thought-provoking letter yesterday, it's from a
Well-intentioned guy who seems to think I've lost my way, he criti-
cized the girls I date... the way I talk... the sport I play... he said I...
hardly seem to be a 'brotha'...
It read, "Excuse me, my intention's not to pry, I'm only
Writing to you 'cause you seem to be a real nice guy, I know you'll
turn this thing around, you see you only have to try, 'cause there are
Fifty ways to be a 'brotha',
Fifty ways to be a 'brotha'..."
"(You should) give up the golf, Rolf
Dump the white chick, Rick
Talk with a drawl, Paul --
and speak with more 'bass'...
Hang out with Spike, Ike
Yes, be a bit like Mike
But always look pissed, Chris
And speak out on race..."
"Shoulder a chip, Flip
Refer to 'The Man', Stan
Denounce your sport, Mort,
for being "too white..."
Wear an Afro, Joe --
Or maybe some corn rows?
And order coffee, 'G',
that's 'black' and not 'light'..."
I think that's fine, if that's what 'blackness' is for you, I think the
Problem is, diversity of images are few, he under-
states things... cause there's really many more than fifty ways...
I think a broader view's what people often lack, of what it
Means to be a Muslim, Jew, an Asian or a Black, we like to
Pigeonhole the 'types' we love, the 'types' we should attack, but there's a....
zillion ways to be a 'brotha',
zillion ways to be a 'brotha'...
(You can) date a black girl, Burl
(Or) date who you like, Ike
Date a Jewish guy, Ty
If guys are your style...
(You can) date a white actress --
(It) won't change your blackness!
Just be true to YOU, Stu --
You're 'you' for a while...
Tee up at the green, Dean
(Or) shoot a few hoops, Duke
Take up raquetball, Paul --
It's only a game...
Play some polo, Joe --
('Cause) that sport has NO 'bro's! --
Or take up hockey, Steve
And don't be ashamed...
(You can) vote 'Democrat', Nat
(Or) vote for the 'Right', Dwight
(You can) pick either side, Wyatt,
(Or) vote 'Indy' or 'Green'...
Vote who you trust, Gus --
(Yes,) vote with your conscience...
(But) whatever you do, Lou,
Just stay on the scene...
Well-intentioned guy who seems to think I've lost my way, he criti-
cized the girls I date... the way I talk... the sport I play... he said I...
hardly seem to be a 'brotha'...
It read, "Excuse me, my intention's not to pry, I'm only
Writing to you 'cause you seem to be a real nice guy, I know you'll
turn this thing around, you see you only have to try, 'cause there are
Fifty ways to be a 'brotha',
Fifty ways to be a 'brotha'..."
"(You should) give up the golf, Rolf
Dump the white chick, Rick
Talk with a drawl, Paul --
and speak with more 'bass'...
Hang out with Spike, Ike
Yes, be a bit like Mike
But always look pissed, Chris
And speak out on race..."
"Shoulder a chip, Flip
Refer to 'The Man', Stan
Denounce your sport, Mort,
for being "too white..."
Wear an Afro, Joe --
Or maybe some corn rows?
And order coffee, 'G',
that's 'black' and not 'light'..."
I think that's fine, if that's what 'blackness' is for you, I think the
Problem is, diversity of images are few, he under-
states things... cause there's really many more than fifty ways...
I think a broader view's what people often lack, of what it
Means to be a Muslim, Jew, an Asian or a Black, we like to
Pigeonhole the 'types' we love, the 'types' we should attack, but there's a....
zillion ways to be a 'brotha',
zillion ways to be a 'brotha'...
(You can) date a black girl, Burl
(Or) date who you like, Ike
Date a Jewish guy, Ty
If guys are your style...
(You can) date a white actress --
(It) won't change your blackness!
Just be true to YOU, Stu --
You're 'you' for a while...
Tee up at the green, Dean
(Or) shoot a few hoops, Duke
Take up raquetball, Paul --
It's only a game...
Play some polo, Joe --
('Cause) that sport has NO 'bro's! --
Or take up hockey, Steve
And don't be ashamed...
(You can) vote 'Democrat', Nat
(Or) vote for the 'Right', Dwight
(You can) pick either side, Wyatt,
(Or) vote 'Indy' or 'Green'...
Vote who you trust, Gus --
(Yes,) vote with your conscience...
(But) whatever you do, Lou,
Just stay on the scene...
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
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| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 5 | 4 | 4 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
Thought-provoking. 5's
Funny and intelligent. But "Clyde" would have made a better rhyme than "Wyatt."
Yer right -- Clyde also sounds more like a brotha' (oops, stereotyping...). Thanks.
Much better than I thought it was going to be, Leo... definitely a worthwhile entry in the ABCs 'F' round.
Clever parody, and like Adagio said, very thought provoking. Fives all the way, Jay.
Extra points for not just repeating the chorus. And for walking that thin black line.
I had to check this out because I know Ashkicksass has such great taste in parodies...and I saw her comment. Excellent work! 5s from me!
(ABC) Good parody!
Thanks, everyone for your recent comments. Much appreciated!
(ABC) An interesting bit of thought, Leo. 555.
What does (ABC) mean/indicate?
Kinfuzed...a number of the veteran parody writers here decided to make a friendly competition of nominating their "best" parodies each month based on each letter of the alphabet...hence, it is known as "The ABC's Competition". The complete rules,nominees and votes are seen at the inthe00s messageboard under "Parody Contests". The contestants are also the voters, and make Comments as they feel necessary towards these entries with the additional tag of "(ABC)". Got it? :) We are in the middle of "F", with "G" submissions being collected right now.
Yo, yo, yo, this parody was off the HOOK! (In other words, Michael Pacholek likes it.)
(ABC) This be excellent! ;-)
Good job, Mr. Jay. 5's
The significance of '(ABC)' clicked in once I went over to the message board to vote, but thanks for the explanation. Thanks, peeps, for lettin' me keep it real with this parody, yo. 'M-Pac', your pszyeudonym is the shiznit. Had me rollin', bruh.
(ABC) This is very clever and slick!
very interesting and thought provoking .. 5s
(ABC) 5'd, and I think you won my vote.
I likes it, especially the stanza that ends with 'zillion ways to be a brotha'. However, you gotta update your brain software from that 'no mixed race stuff' bro. Black guys, many who I watch on TV and some who I know personally, have no problem dating white girls. It was done for humor, but on Chapelle's Show, Tiger Woods dating a white girl was pointed out to SUPPORT his blackness. 'Refer to the 'Man', Stan' was my fave.
Great job, Lee OJ. Fave lines:
"I think a broader view's what people often lack, of what it
Means to be a Muslim, Jew, an Asian or a Black"
Poetry, baby.
"I think a broader view's what people often lack, of what it
Means to be a Muslim, Jew, an Asian or a Black"
Poetry, baby.
Thanks guys for all the recent comments. When I posted this, I wasn't sure it would get much feedback (if any), so your comments are a pleasant surprise!
2nz, just realized I have no idea which parody you were reading. But it wasn't mine.
I'll cull my comments to 'Some neato word play, Jay!' 555
555 from a black guy who has been accused of the crimes brought up in this parody many times...
Thanks for the recent propz, fellaz.
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