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Song Parodies -> "Fifty Days to Love Her Beaver"

Original Song Title:

"Fifty Ways to Leave Your Lover"

Original Performer:

Paul Simon

Parody Song Title:

"Fifty Days to Love Her Beaver"

Parody Written by:

Porfle Popnecker

The Lyrics

"The problem is you don't understand," so stated she
Here's what you must do to take my hand and marry me
The date's approaching, and the answer's plain to see
You just have fifty days to love my beaver

She said he's like a baby to your future bride
I adore each hairy millimeter of his fuzzy hide
And I'll enunciate, just to make it bonafide
I'll give you fifty days to love my beaver
Fifty days to love my beaver

You just nuzzle his nose, Moze
Chuckle his chin, Flynn
You don't need to go nuts, Butz
Just start to believe
Tickle his bum, Chum
Blow his tummy, pah-rum-pum
Just feed him some leaves, Jeeves
Start lovin' that beav

Ooo, give him a hug, Doug
Sing him a song, Wong
You just give him a treat, Pete
You'll start to believe
Play patty-cake, Jake
Take him out to a clambake
Just roll up your sleeve, Treve
Keep workin' that beav

She said my beaver's starting to regard you well
I think maybe he believes you have an inoffensive smell
I said I am overjoyed but I might need, who can tell
Another fifty days...

She said why don't you give my baby beav his bot
And I believe when you burp him you'll adore that furry tot
And then it hit me that my mind was going rapidly to pot
I won't need fifty days to love her beaver
Fifty days to love her beaver

I just give him a bath, Kath
Tuck him in bed, Jed
I don't need to freak out, Scout
Cause now I believe
Oh, I play peek-a-boo, Stu
Make a face and say goo-goo
No need to be peeved, Cleve
Just workin' that beav

Turn off my brain, Jane
Goin' cross-eyed, Clyde
I don't need to think straight, Nate
Just need to believe
Take him to school, Jewel
I'm a slobberin' drool-fool
But no need to grieve, Steve
I'm lovin' that beav

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   7

User Comments

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Rob Arndt - March 01, 2012 - Report this comment
Again, clever-555! But the title is misleading!
Porfle Popnecker - March 01, 2012 - Report this comment
But there's no way to not make it misleading!
Matthias - April 07, 2012 - Report this comment
I'm a fan of Beaver parodies... They're much better than Bieber parodies because I would rather be around a beaver than a Bieber. Plus it reminds me of this song from How I Met Your Mother:
Porfle Popnecker - April 07, 2012 - Report this comment
And from what I've heard, Biebers can't even build a decent dam.
Agrimorfee - April 07, 2012 - Report this comment
This parody would be a bit hard to grasp if it was recorded. But then again, I have a hard time grasping lots of Paul Simon's lyrics. This is a hard song to parody and you did it good.
Porfle Popnecker - April 07, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks! I hear Paul Simon's pretty hard to grasp himself, at least when he's fully greased!
Mark Scotti - April 10, 2012 - Report this comment
(ABC) (Mrs. Cleaver to Mr. Cleaver), "Ward, I think you were a little hard on the beaver last night!"...LOL
Porfle Popnecker - April 10, 2012 - Report this comment
"Well, June, he just doesn't seem to give a dam."
bobpiecheese - April 14, 2012 - Report this comment
(ABC) Well, I've heard of weirder conditions. If the double entendre title was unintentional then that would surprise me. Great parody here, 555!
Porfle Popnecker - April 14, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks! Actually it's a triple entendre, but to fully understand it you'd have to speak Swahili.
Blaydeman - April 15, 2012 - Report this comment
(ABC) The title itself was hilarious! Great job!
Porfle Popnecker - April 16, 2012 - Report this comment
Much obliged!
Abbott Skelding - April 17, 2012 - Report this comment
Surprisingly, this is the first "50 Ways..." parody I've read...and what a good one to read it was! Excellent job! (Double points for the CLAMbake line)
Porfle Popnecker - April 17, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks a lot! Glad it's the first--that means it's the best (so far, anyway)!

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