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Song Parodies -> "Kinky Ways To Love Your Lover"

Original Song Title:

"Fifty Ways To Leave Your Lover"

Original Performer:

Paul Simon

Parody Song Title:

"Kinky Ways To Love Your Lover"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Tie her up to the ceiling fan, she whirls free
Then lie close underneath her anatomy
Might take an engineering plan, drawn graphically
But there are kinky ways to love your lover

When rain and lightning's flashin' hard, roll in the yard
Knock over Rover's dish that's full a' Pard
Hear tires screech, real loud on the boulevard..
There's lots a' kinky ways to love your lover

Try out the railroad track, Jack
Mess in mud, Bud
Bang at Walmart, Art
Behind a TV..
Pound by the zoo, Sue
Inside the library, Mary
Just be obscene, Jean
Wherever you want to..

Fly high on an airline flight and restroom rub
Gain membership in that famous mile high club
Get back at them for their fares, and the lousy grub
Try new and kinky ways to love your lover..

Drive down the freeway, Ray..park on the grassy middle..strip!
Ride on a rollercoaster nude, and flip a hip..
go golfing, and lose your balls..make a bush trip
There's many kinky ways to love your lover

Shag in the swim pool, Jewel
At the park, Mark
Try the swingset, Bette
Hump up on a bridge
A carousel, Mel
On woofer bass, Grace
Top of the washer, Sasha
The freezer, or the fridge!

Explore all kinky ways to love your lover...

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   1
 4   0
 5   9

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Peregrin - June 17, 2008 - Report this comment
I got three ways to leave you fivers, AFW :) Good read. Love the bit about the airline fares and grub, and rub. Made me think of a certain stewardess for some reason!
renaldo - June 17, 2008 - Report this comment
Who voted 311? Missionary Jerry?
littleLoveCakes - June 17, 2008 - Report this comment
Sir . . . this is well . . . although it's naughty, it does give a tingle! Especially when the "rain & lightning is flashing" It is a moving piece, ~Gentleman L'Air~ !
UnKnownVoTricks - June 17, 2008 - Report this comment
2nd View: Sir L'Air, some of these images are just so hard to forget ! This is true zaniness at its height! And it does sound like you've tried a few of these . . .
AFW - June 17, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks, Peregrin...renaldo, LLC, and the way...Aren't yu last 2 the same person?
alvin - June 17, 2008 - Report this comment
this is fave of the day
littleCupCakes - June 17, 2008 - Report this comment
Yes, I am the ~CommenTrix~ on both of those! I ove to play with my words, Sir! Many great lines you have produced here! . . . " tires screeching on the Boulevard" Hot Summer nights o'Love cakes!!
Guy - June 17, 2008 - Report this comment
Farce - There also must be 50 ways to rub a rubber. This is one of those OS's that just beg to be spoofed and you spoofed it as good as it gets.

Won't give you no ones, son
A two is too few, Stu
A three cannot be, Lee
Throw four out the door, Knorr

You get yourself fives.
MrMacphisto - June 18, 2008 - Report this comment
Best of the day! :)
Kristof Robertson - June 18, 2008 - Report this comment
Saucy as hell and riotously funny, AFW. Probably a bit TMI, but I'll let it slide....;-). A big set o' 5s.

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