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Song Parodies -> "50 Ways To Meet Your Maker"

Original Song Title:

"50 Ways To Leave Your Lover"

Original Performer:

Paul Simon

Parody Song Title:

"50 Ways To Meet Your Maker"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Monsters used to scare me. Kid stuff compared to things today.
The feeling of overwhelming dread comes over me
The ending comes quite quickly and even tragically
No one to help me in my struggle just to breathe
There must be fifty ways to meet your maker

Don't want to be part of a stabbing interlude
Lock the door I hope not to become some slimy creatures food
But I'll repent my sins, in the hopes of getting through
There must be fifty ways to meet your maker
Fifty ways to meet your maker

A scythe in the back, jack
Meet the wolfman, stan
You buy a possessed toy, roy
Just try not to pee
Lop off a head, fred
Signs not to be misread then
It's Christopher Lee, flee
In bloodsucking glee

The tomb has been cracked, jack
Bad fam'ly clan, stan
A Damien named boy, roy
Just listen for screams
Don't give in to lust, gus
You will suffer knife thrusts just
On this halloween, lee
A boogie man spree

The open graves spew zombies to munch on my brains
I wish there was someway I could see it coming from Claude Rains
I try to coagulate fast, but no one can explain
About the fifty ways

It's said try not to go to sleep during the night
And if alive in the morning you'll be safer in the light
But then the globe keeps warming, which is just as much a fright
There must be fifty ways to cool the planet
Fifty ways to cool the planet

Just winterize your shack, jack
Recycle cans, stan
Eat more meatless soy, roy
And plant some tall trees
Buy a Prius, gus
Carpool or ride the bus much
Turn down the degrees, lee
Don't be bourgeoisie

Just stuff your backpack, jack
Live off the land, stan
Windmills you'll deploy, roy
Become a hippie
Tie dye your bus, gus
Save organics and thus mulch
A hut in a tree, lee
And live among leaves

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.3

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   7

User Comments

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Michael Pacholek - October 31, 2007 - Report this comment
This parody was so good, it's scary. By a weird coincidence, the security code for this comment was "HUN" -- and Attilla the Hun sure made a lot of people meet their maker. Take these fives, and get some rest. You look like death warmed over.
renaldo - October 31, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks Michael. Are you saying I look like Keith Richards?
Tommy Turtle - October 31, 2007 - Report this comment
The theme switch halfway through was sort of weird, but Fives just for mentioning Claude Rains. Renaldo, this could be the beginning of a beautiful parodyship.
John Barry - October 31, 2007 - Report this comment
I'm with TT. Claude is buried in Moultonborough, New Hampshire, my state of origin.
Ann Hammond - October 31, 2007 - Report this comment
I like this
alvin - October 31, 2007 - Report this comment
nice and halloweeny
renaldo - October 31, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks Tommy, John and Ann.
Kristof Robertson - October 31, 2007 - Report this comment
The title grabbed me, and you followed up with a pretty darn good parody, Renaldo. 555
renaldo - October 31, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks Alvin and Kristof.
Guy - October 31, 2007 - Report this comment
Been a lot of 50 ways songs on this site and I'm responsible for a few. The title grabbed me right away and I simply loved it. Best 50 ways I've seen on this site and that includes the Spafforized ones. I loved the switch you did in the middle. Except I really don't believe that global warming "eventuality" is going to effect the gene pool in the slightest. What are you going to tell God when you die? I warmed to death? I caught the connection between the two if no one else did. Super job! Raise the dead 5. I'll see that raise and raise the temp another 5. Call! 5 aces!
Jonathan S. - November 01, 2007 - Report this comment
[The first 9 words of Tommy's comment] Good title, and the parody was pretty good, but the switch halfway kinda turned me off, to be honest. 534
malcolm higgins - November 02, 2007 - Report this comment
renaldo - November 03, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks Guy, Jonathan, and Malcolm. It was one of those strange whims that I followed in switching themes. In hindsight, two separate parodies might've been better. Thanks again to all who commented.

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