Song Parodies -> "Cretin Jeffrey Toobin Guy"

Original Song Title:

"(Creole) Lady Marmalade"

Original Performer:

"Cretin Jeffrey Toobin Guy"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

Thought I was done parodying this ridiculous episode, but no, it has reared its ugly head again as CNN has welcomed Jeffrey Toobin back. Now, I have no choice but to unleash my tactical parody nuke .. Lady Marmalade

Hey Mister, go Mister, show Mister, blow Mister
Hey Mister, go Mister, show Mister, blow Mister

He flashed his press aide down at ol' Zoomie Chat
Shucking his stuff on the screen
She said, "Hey, hello there, Toob"
You gonna act like a boob
Gitchee, gitchee yayas, Dumbass
Gitchee, gitchee yayas here
Chicken choke-a lotta, yaya
Cretin Spanky Monkey guy

Voulez vous loosez Onan wad, ce Slob
Voulez vous douchez bagging guy

He lost all his cool when he went off
That boy viewed too much man boy lovin porn
On that zoom chat screen where he started his freak
Squinty squinty ya ya diddle
Squinty squinty ya ya here
Dolphin waxa lotta yaya
Cretin yanky Onan guy

Pullez vous crankshaft Toobin guy, ce swine
Pullez vous crankshaft Onan guy

Seeing his pud's filthy spew
Color of cafe au lait
Made the moral girl inside
Abhor till she cried .. NO! .. NO! .. NO!
Now hes at home with no nine to five
Trying to pawn off a lie
But when he turns on the news
They're mocking his spews
Jizzie, jizzie ya ya piddle
Twitchy twitchy yaya here
Tallywacker jacka yaya
Cretin Jeffrey Toomer GUY!!

Toobin vous cretin, Jeffrey guy, ce slime
Toobin vous cretin, Onan guy
Toobin vous doucher baggin guy, ce swine

(Fade out)

Pullez vous crankshaft, Toobin guy, ce slime
Toolez vous crankshaft, 'turbin' guy
Shuckez vous your stuff, 'turbin guy, ce swine
Zoomie vous douchez bagging guy
Screwez vous career, Toobin guy, ce swine
Nukez vous career, Toobin guy

I was thinking of doing something with "Yankee Doodle Dandy", but I may have popped my wad with "Lady Marmalade"

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Jeffrey Toobin - June 28, 2021 - Report this comment

I got off easy.

The Authorities - June 28, 2021 - Report this comment

Thats because we no longer prosecute the laws against public masturbation to its fullest extent. Apparently juries think if they go too hard on public masturbators, they'll just take the law into their own hands

CML - June 28, 2021 - Report this comment

^^^^^That last part is a old George Carlin joke. Whenever I steal jokes, I make sure I only rip off the great ones

John Dacey - June 28, 2021 - Report this comment

Not for the faint of heart, but good fun. Liked the word play off the OS title and the 'he's at home with no nine to five' integration. Nice work.

CML - June 30, 2021 - Report this comment

Well now, talk about support from an unexpected source! ..... Its always interesting to hear what strikes another persons funny bone. I was thinking the "no nine to five" line wasnt original enough. I was trying, at the very end, to come up with a replacement, but couldn't think of anything .. so I said, "Meh, just leave it; its not that bad" Seriously

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