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Song Parodies -> "Mad Cow Disease"

Original Song Title:

"Please Mr. Please"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Olivia Newton-John

Parody Song Title:

"Mad Cow Disease"

Parody Written by:

Guy DiRito

The Lyrics

In the corral near the barn that one ain't cow pox.
It's a pestilence that's way worse than swine flu.
Just as well blow your whole herd up with a mortar.
Or the US FDA will make some glue.

If you be unluckly and your herd encounters,
It's the end and there's no help for cows insane,
A machine gun totin' cowboy with a shock prong,
Will send them greener pastures this is plain.

Mad cow disease, this beef's not for cuisine,
This is one throng that is long gone, no more clover.
Mad cow disease, it will turn their brains green,
You won't ever do no ranchin' here again.

You won't get a dime for that rib prime I tell you,
So just watch that stray, it's not your property.
Then you'll have to rename your old ranch to Trashville,
You'll be headin' for a state called bankruptcy.

Nothing left but these old carcases to gather,
And that PETA group says to animals be kind.
And I swear if I hear from them one more lecture,
I will slap their eyeballs off until they're blind.

Mad cow disease, this beef's not for cuisine,
This is one throng that is long gone, no more clover.
Mad cow disease, it will turn their brains green,
You won't ever do no ranchin' here again.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.0
How Funny: 3.0
Overall Rating: 3.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 0
 
 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   1
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User Comments

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Adagio - December 24, 2003 - Report this comment
Is that still going on? 5's
Guy - December 24, 2003 - Report this comment
Yes Pat, it's all over the news today. They found a case in Washington state and the meat has already been sold and probably consumed. It is the first confirmed case in the US.
Adagio - December 24, 2003 - Report this comment
Ewww...I like chicken anyway.
Stray Pooch - December 24, 2003 - Report this comment
Just when beef was reaping the benefits of the low-carb diet fad this has to happen.
Johnny D - December 24, 2003 - Report this comment
DKTOS, Guy, but a good write on a serious current topic.
Paul Robinson - December 24, 2003 - Report this comment
Guy, yes...saw article about the Washington State confirmation in this morning's paper. UGH! Well, I had trimmed my meat consumption down quite a bit anyway, but it's going to get smaller still. Anyway, I really like to make Spaghetti with Black Olives so I guess that's dinner tonight. DKTOS so couldn't vote.
Jonathan C. - December 24, 2003 - Report this comment
I had sandwich with roast beef in it. So I'm waiting for Mad Cow's poison to take effect. *Groan!*
Michael Pacholek - December 26, 2003 - Report this comment
It would explain the way some of the "brains" on this board "work."
Michael McVey - December 26, 2003 - Report this comment
All that riff-raff over ONE COW. According to the 2004 World Alamnac, there are 1.1 million cows in Washington State. 13.6 million in Texas and 96.1 million in the entire U.S. I'm not making any changes in my beef consumption over ONE COW, and I wouldn't even if that cow were right here in Texas. If the cow were here in Bexar County, maybe I'd be concerned, but still I wouldn't want the whole national beef industry to collapse over ONE COW. Excuse me while I go to Wendys and order a triple.

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