(Do-a-bit-dude-a-bit-do-it-to-it)
Drank some port, taste like ocean spray,
I must have went a hundred times today,
Lowly vintage piss the day away,
Just watching bubbles foam.

Then I tried to get some bourbon down,
and chased it with some Royal Crown,
That old Brand X, grab another round,
Started feelin' frisky and fine.

A shaker of Brand X, make your spine curl (hope I don't hurl)
Just like a wine this could be (such a fine wine)
Yeah with ice could peel the paint off when I pee,
(Do-a-bit-dude-a-bit-do-it-to-it)

Brand X sears the weighed brain,
Made from finest barley and finest grain,
Can't knock it, might make you lame,
Just handle it with gloves.

Then it came that bummer day,
It hit swift, I have to say,
Drinking ever clear with ocean spray,
It's hardcore to the bone.

A shaker of Brand X, make your spine curl, (hope I don't hurl)
Just like fine wine this could be, (such a fine wine)
Yeah with ice could peel the paint off when I pee.
(Do-a-bit-dude-a-bit-do-it-to-it)

Yeah, Brand X really takes the prize,
You'll be wavin' like old glory,
You can feel the potion blur your eyes,
And it will always raise the roof, lord, it is the oddest brand.
How much more of Brand X can I stand?
(Do-a-bit-dude-a-bit-do-it-to-it)

I fight when the bars close down,
Drank all the Brand X that's in town,
I'll sleep now really fast and sound,
Tomorrow's when I'll pay.

I'll hear me say Brand X, you make me hurl, (not like fine wine)
Like a sharp knife you cut me, (such a fine hone)
Oh my strife, my liver, maladies, whoa is me.
(Do-a-bit-dude-a-bit-do-it-to-it)

Brand X tastes like Pine Sol (make a mime hurl)
FADE

Like a sharp knife you cut me, (such a fine hone)
Oh my strife, my liver, maladies, whoa is me.