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Song Parodies -> "The Trader"

Original Song Title:

"The Gambler"

Original Performer:

Kenny Rogers

Parody Song Title:

"The Trader"

Parody Written by:

Andrew Lardieri

The Lyrics

On a warm summer’s evening on a ship bound for nowhere
I met up with a trader we were both too tired to sleep
So we took turn’s a starin’ at the window at the darkness
The boredom overtook us and he began to speak

He said, “Kid I’ve made a life out of readin’ people’s faces
And knowin’ what the cards are by the way they held their eyes
So if you don’t mind me sayin’ I can see your out of Skydogs
For a taste of your root beer I’ll give you some advice,”

So I handed him my bottle and he drank down my last swallow
Then he bummed a fruit roll-up and asked me for a wipe
And the night got deathly quiet and his face lost all expression
Said “if you’re gonna play the game boy you gotta learn to play it right.”

Chorus:
You gotta know how to trade ‘em
Know how to swap ‘em
Know when to walk away
And know how to run
You never stack your pile
When you’re sittin’ at the table
There’ll be time enough for stackin’
When the tradin’s done

Every trader knows the secret to survivin’
Is knowin’ what to throw away and knowin’ what to keep
‘Cause every nerd’s a winner and every nerd’s a loser
And the best that you can do is to die in your sleep

And when he finished speakin’ he turned back toward the window
Crushed up his fruit roll-up and drifted off to sleep
And somewhere in the darkness the trader he broke even
But in his final words I found a Skydog I could keep

Chorus (3x)

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

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Susanna Viljanen - May 19, 2021 - Report this comment
As a RPG veteran, I loved this one. Fives - I sang the tune.
Cactus Impersonator - May 19, 2021 - Report this comment
Stellar!!! 555!!! :-) This spurred me to create my own parody of this song...it should be online within the next day or so. :-)
Cactus Impersonator - May 20, 2021 - Report this comment
My parody of this song is now online: http://www.amiright.com/parody/70s/kennyrogers67.shtml :-) Thank you for giving me the idea to parody this particular song!!! :-)

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